I'm sure we've all done it. Created an illusion of someone based on someone we have just met. Then we make the fateful mistake of assuming that illusion and reality are one and the same thing. We soon find ourselves enamored by the idea of a person, whether it's because we looking for a soul mate or a new best friend. We place our hopes and fears into this person and hope against hope that our trust has been properly placed. We believe that this person is different and they understand us, complete us and will be with us for the rest of our lives. Then, the inevitable happens. They disappoint us.
Living the life of the expat I have learned one thing. People are rarely what they seem and certainly not what we want/hope/need them to be. When your options are limited, you make friends with anyone who will talk to you. You convince yourself that this shared experience will bind your friendship forever. You overlook things that would normally drive you crazy, and forgive what could otherwise be considered unforgivable. You are lonely and believe that the only people who can understand what that feels like are the people who have decided to live the same nomadic lifestyle. You are wrong.
The truth, as I see it, is that there are people who are meant to come into your life for a certain amount of time. Many of those of people are were friends of circumstance. People who would talk to you, that you shared a common experience with and as such were willing to overlook other personality "flaws." They were in your life when you needed them to be there, they were there for you, they taught you something about yourself, helped you get on your way or stopped you from doing something rash. In the end, the biggest disappointment is really the illusion that we ourselves have created. We must learn to accept this and move on.
In looking back at this year and my life in Saudi, I have learned a great deal about myself and the people I surround myself with. I have discovered the power of a real friend who may be thousands of miles away, but still knows exactly what to say and when. I have learned that true friends are with you regardless of where you are or how often you talk to them. They are with you in good and bad and have no problems in telling you when you are wrong or have made a mistake without passing judgment. They listen when all you need to do is vent, and will do their best to make you laugh when all you want to do is cry. While they may not know what it feels like to live where you do, they know you, and in the end that's all that really matters. These are the people that are with for the rest of your life and I have learned that we all need to take more time out of days to let these people know how lucky we are to have them in our lives and how much better our lives are because of them. Thank you to all of you who fall into this category.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
A Saudi Wedding
This week I was invited to go to a Saudi wedding. No, I was not invited by the groom, or the bride. I was invited by a friend who happens to know the groom and asked if I and another friend could come along. He said yes.
Now there a couple of things everyone should know about Saudi weddings. One, they start at midnight. Two, the are during the week. Three, there are two; one for the groom and the men, and another for the bride and the women. Yes, like all things Saudi, the weddings are segregated by gender. Which in my mind begs the question, and you were invited by the groom?
As it was explained to me, it is not uncommon for people to bring their friends to a wedding. Most weddings want to be large, and this is one of the few occasions that people (or in this case women) can gather, dance and be merry. However, I was also told that I would need a dress. So we went shopping.
Traditionally I'm a big fan of shopping, but shopping in Saudi is not quite the same (for reasons I have mentioned before). This time, however, I was faced with what seemed like an insurmountable problem, I wanted a simple dress that would not go above my budget. Alas, it was not to be. The dresses in all the store we went to (and we must have visited at least 10 stores) were horribly over the top (think sequence, glitter, feathers and bling... all on one dress) and excessively over-priced. So I decided to wear one of my old dresses. Fine.
We arrive at the wedding (fashionable early?) at 11:30pm. We turn in our invitations and are ushered inside a room behind a partition. Once inside, we take off our abayas and hand them to clerk. I hear what I think is some kind of door bell, it is not. It is a woman "announcing" the arrival of guests to the party. She's loud.
We are among the first to arrive. The tables are set (23 to be exact). The all have large center pieces, coffee, sweets and hours d'oeuvres. There is live music (four women singing to what I though was recoded music) and a stage. Add to this, the waitresses (yes everyone in the room is female) who are coming around with a bunch of other little appetizers and sweets.
However, that is not the first thing I notice. In fact, I am too caught up in all of the colors! I guess since women here are forced to wear black all day, they go all out when it comes to these events. Pink, gold, blue, white, red, purple, yellow and every color in between, and what's more they are all dancing! Yes, I'll admit it is still a little weird to me see only women dancing (with no men anywhere to be seen) but what is more this is a (dare I say it?) sensual dance! It's kind of like Colombian cumbia with belly dancing added in.
Now here is the interesting tidbit. The women are all dancing on this stage that basically resembles a cat walk, and the mothers are watching. I am told that basically the mothers are looking to see who among these single women would be able to "satisfy" their sons (because obviously dancing must be a proxy for something else) and be marriage material. So, a wedding is also a matchmaking session. Very interesting indeed.
The party continues, with lots of dancing until suddenly (at like 2am) everyone starts to put their abaya back on. The lights dim. And finally the bride arrives, with her husband (thus the need for abayas). They walk down the cat walk in a spot light while everyone claps and yells their well wishes. The couple stand there for a while just kind of looking out at the crowd (behind the lights). And then it's time for the groom to go and for dinner to be served (at 3am). By now, however, my friends and I are too exhausted and decide to skip the meal which consisted of a huge buffet of all kinds of things.
Clearly just another day (or night) in Saudi!
Now there a couple of things everyone should know about Saudi weddings. One, they start at midnight. Two, the are during the week. Three, there are two; one for the groom and the men, and another for the bride and the women. Yes, like all things Saudi, the weddings are segregated by gender. Which in my mind begs the question, and you were invited by the groom?
As it was explained to me, it is not uncommon for people to bring their friends to a wedding. Most weddings want to be large, and this is one of the few occasions that people (or in this case women) can gather, dance and be merry. However, I was also told that I would need a dress. So we went shopping.
Traditionally I'm a big fan of shopping, but shopping in Saudi is not quite the same (for reasons I have mentioned before). This time, however, I was faced with what seemed like an insurmountable problem, I wanted a simple dress that would not go above my budget. Alas, it was not to be. The dresses in all the store we went to (and we must have visited at least 10 stores) were horribly over the top (think sequence, glitter, feathers and bling... all on one dress) and excessively over-priced. So I decided to wear one of my old dresses. Fine.
We arrive at the wedding (fashionable early?) at 11:30pm. We turn in our invitations and are ushered inside a room behind a partition. Once inside, we take off our abayas and hand them to clerk. I hear what I think is some kind of door bell, it is not. It is a woman "announcing" the arrival of guests to the party. She's loud.
We are among the first to arrive. The tables are set (23 to be exact). The all have large center pieces, coffee, sweets and hours d'oeuvres. There is live music (four women singing to what I though was recoded music) and a stage. Add to this, the waitresses (yes everyone in the room is female) who are coming around with a bunch of other little appetizers and sweets.
However, that is not the first thing I notice. In fact, I am too caught up in all of the colors! I guess since women here are forced to wear black all day, they go all out when it comes to these events. Pink, gold, blue, white, red, purple, yellow and every color in between, and what's more they are all dancing! Yes, I'll admit it is still a little weird to me see only women dancing (with no men anywhere to be seen) but what is more this is a (dare I say it?) sensual dance! It's kind of like Colombian cumbia with belly dancing added in.
Now here is the interesting tidbit. The women are all dancing on this stage that basically resembles a cat walk, and the mothers are watching. I am told that basically the mothers are looking to see who among these single women would be able to "satisfy" their sons (because obviously dancing must be a proxy for something else) and be marriage material. So, a wedding is also a matchmaking session. Very interesting indeed.
The party continues, with lots of dancing until suddenly (at like 2am) everyone starts to put their abaya back on. The lights dim. And finally the bride arrives, with her husband (thus the need for abayas). They walk down the cat walk in a spot light while everyone claps and yells their well wishes. The couple stand there for a while just kind of looking out at the crowd (behind the lights). And then it's time for the groom to go and for dinner to be served (at 3am). By now, however, my friends and I are too exhausted and decide to skip the meal which consisted of a huge buffet of all kinds of things.
Clearly just another day (or night) in Saudi!
Sunday, December 5, 2010
La crisis de los casi treinta
So it has hit me like a ton of bricks, I am now 29, and lets be perfectly honest, 29 is practically 30! I realize that 50 is the new 40 and 40 is the new 30, so I guess 30 must be the new 25? (because really who wants to be 20 again?)
When I was younger, I wondered (as so many of us do) what my life would look like by the time I was 30. Clearly I would be married to a wonderful man, have the job of my dreams and probably a kid. I would be living in a great city in my own house and life would perfect. Little did I know, that instead I would turning 29 in Lebanon because I live in Saudi Arabia.
I turned 29 in the company of friends who understood that I did not want to hit this "milestone" in KSA because I was going to need a stiff drink to face the reality of what my life had become. The weeks around my birthday were among my worst here. I had gotten really down on myself and was really tired with the job, the life (or lack thereof) and everything in between. I was disappointed in myself, as if somehow I had made a mistake somewhere along the way that had gotten me to that point. Everything looked gray and miserable.
The birthday weekend itself was fraught with it's own series of problems. A friend of mine was detained in passport control upon our arrival in Beirut because was born in Iraq and his name was on some list. Turns out there are at least 1,000 people with the same name, and a number of them are wanted for doing bad things. On top of that, Iranian president Ahmedinejad was also going to be in Beirut for the weekend, so everyone was on high alert. A bad time to have a common name. Long story short, after two days of going back and forth to passport control, my friend was finally able to prove that he was who he said he was and allowed to travel within Lebanon.
As for Ahmedinejad, we actually did cross his caravan thrice! All in the same day. All within about an hour. The first time, we saw them in the distance as the president must have been giving some speech. The second time we saw the caravan drive by and were even privy to seeing men point their very large guns at us as they went by. One of them was literally holding the back door of an SUV open with his legs so as to have his arms free for said very large gun. The third time, we saw the caravan at what must have been the hotel where the president was staying. I think it's safe to say, that by then, the glamor of our "celebrity sighting" had worn off.
The rest of the trip was fun. We saw Baalbeck, the Cedars and went up the "teleferique." Overall, however, I was not as impressed by my trip as I thought I was going to be. I was expecting over the top partying and we didn't really do any of that, it was after all the Saudi weekend, which is right smack in the middle of everyone else's work week. So maybe that had something to do with it. Oh well, will have to give it another go at some point, but this time will make sure that it's a Fri - Mon kind of thing.
When I was younger, I wondered (as so many of us do) what my life would look like by the time I was 30. Clearly I would be married to a wonderful man, have the job of my dreams and probably a kid. I would be living in a great city in my own house and life would perfect. Little did I know, that instead I would turning 29 in Lebanon because I live in Saudi Arabia.
I turned 29 in the company of friends who understood that I did not want to hit this "milestone" in KSA because I was going to need a stiff drink to face the reality of what my life had become. The weeks around my birthday were among my worst here. I had gotten really down on myself and was really tired with the job, the life (or lack thereof) and everything in between. I was disappointed in myself, as if somehow I had made a mistake somewhere along the way that had gotten me to that point. Everything looked gray and miserable.
The birthday weekend itself was fraught with it's own series of problems. A friend of mine was detained in passport control upon our arrival in Beirut because was born in Iraq and his name was on some list. Turns out there are at least 1,000 people with the same name, and a number of them are wanted for doing bad things. On top of that, Iranian president Ahmedinejad was also going to be in Beirut for the weekend, so everyone was on high alert. A bad time to have a common name. Long story short, after two days of going back and forth to passport control, my friend was finally able to prove that he was who he said he was and allowed to travel within Lebanon.
As for Ahmedinejad, we actually did cross his caravan thrice! All in the same day. All within about an hour. The first time, we saw them in the distance as the president must have been giving some speech. The second time we saw the caravan drive by and were even privy to seeing men point their very large guns at us as they went by. One of them was literally holding the back door of an SUV open with his legs so as to have his arms free for said very large gun. The third time, we saw the caravan at what must have been the hotel where the president was staying. I think it's safe to say, that by then, the glamor of our "celebrity sighting" had worn off.
The rest of the trip was fun. We saw Baalbeck, the Cedars and went up the "teleferique." Overall, however, I was not as impressed by my trip as I thought I was going to be. I was expecting over the top partying and we didn't really do any of that, it was after all the Saudi weekend, which is right smack in the middle of everyone else's work week. So maybe that had something to do with it. Oh well, will have to give it another go at some point, but this time will make sure that it's a Fri - Mon kind of thing.
Saturday, October 2, 2010
The Life?
It's been a while since I've posted anything on here and I do apologize for that, so this is my attempt make up for lost time and to update you all (if there is anyone still reading this) what I have been doing for the last two months.
July
As you know from my previous post, July started on a high (with the end of my safari and trip to Egypt) and ended with a low (with what might be the stupidest accident ever). After my accident, I did fly to Florida to visit family, and go to the doctor (let's just say I have more confidence on the health care I could receive there). After about a week, I was back in walking shape and was able to enjoy the rest of my time with my family.
August
August started in Florida where I was able to attend the wedding of a dear friends of mine from KAUST. He got married in a beautiful ocean-view ceremony. After that, I had the adventure (or "dis" adventure) of a lifetime in trying to get back to Saudi. Turns out my original flight was canceled and because my tickets had been so cheap I had a terrible time trying to get anyone else to get me back to KSA in time. In the end, it took me almost 48 hours and I was only here for about four days before I was sent to Seattle.
I was in Seattle for almost 10 days and had a lovely time. I was representing the university at a conference (which between you and me was a complete waste of time) but at least I got to see some old friends and be away from Ramadan for a bit.
September
I arrive for the last 10 days of Ramadan. Which is the holy month of fasting in Islam. It was quite an experience. As KSA is the nexus of the Muslim faith, it means they run a pretty tight ship. As a result no one was allowed to be seen with food or drink during the day (whether you were fasting or not) and every single restaurant or food-selling establishment was closed during daylight hours. Suffice to say, that whether you were fasting or not, this was not the easiest time to be at KAUST but it provide another glimpse into a deeply religious society.
After Ramadan came Eid. I should explain that there are no real holidays in KSA, no long weekends (with the exception of one), so basically people take their own vacation time and the two Eid weeks. The first Eid is after Ramandan, a celebration of sorts. The other is during Haj, the pilgrimage. But anyway, there was Eid and me with nothing to do, so do I decide? "Let's go to Greece" and to Greece I went! I visited Athens, Delphi, Olympia, Mycenae and Corinth. I had an incredible time!
I returned for a week and was off again, this time to Oman for the long weekend. The one long weekend of the year, the occasion being 'Saudi National Day.' So what do I (and so many other expats) do? Leave Saudi. Oman was lovely. I highly recommend it for its cleanliness, friendly people and overall happy atmosphere.
And now October is here! Yikes, so much to do so little time...
July
As you know from my previous post, July started on a high (with the end of my safari and trip to Egypt) and ended with a low (with what might be the stupidest accident ever). After my accident, I did fly to Florida to visit family, and go to the doctor (let's just say I have more confidence on the health care I could receive there). After about a week, I was back in walking shape and was able to enjoy the rest of my time with my family.
August
August started in Florida where I was able to attend the wedding of a dear friends of mine from KAUST. He got married in a beautiful ocean-view ceremony. After that, I had the adventure (or "dis" adventure) of a lifetime in trying to get back to Saudi. Turns out my original flight was canceled and because my tickets had been so cheap I had a terrible time trying to get anyone else to get me back to KSA in time. In the end, it took me almost 48 hours and I was only here for about four days before I was sent to Seattle.
I was in Seattle for almost 10 days and had a lovely time. I was representing the university at a conference (which between you and me was a complete waste of time) but at least I got to see some old friends and be away from Ramadan for a bit.
September
I arrive for the last 10 days of Ramadan. Which is the holy month of fasting in Islam. It was quite an experience. As KSA is the nexus of the Muslim faith, it means they run a pretty tight ship. As a result no one was allowed to be seen with food or drink during the day (whether you were fasting or not) and every single restaurant or food-selling establishment was closed during daylight hours. Suffice to say, that whether you were fasting or not, this was not the easiest time to be at KAUST but it provide another glimpse into a deeply religious society.
After Ramadan came Eid. I should explain that there are no real holidays in KSA, no long weekends (with the exception of one), so basically people take their own vacation time and the two Eid weeks. The first Eid is after Ramandan, a celebration of sorts. The other is during Haj, the pilgrimage. But anyway, there was Eid and me with nothing to do, so do I decide? "Let's go to Greece" and to Greece I went! I visited Athens, Delphi, Olympia, Mycenae and Corinth. I had an incredible time!
I returned for a week and was off again, this time to Oman for the long weekend. The one long weekend of the year, the occasion being 'Saudi National Day.' So what do I (and so many other expats) do? Leave Saudi. Oman was lovely. I highly recommend it for its cleanliness, friendly people and overall happy atmosphere.
And now October is here! Yikes, so much to do so little time...
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Squash Lesson a.k.a. You are an Idiot!
And by you, I mean me.
I'll get to why in a second, but first let's recap the past month or so.
1. Safari! Was amazing, there are over 3,000 pictures to prove it. We saw every animal there is to see and with the exception of the rhino, we saw all of them within 10 feet of our car. My safari compatriots were awesome. We had an incredible time.
2. Zanzibar. Very relaxing, although we did have a couple of misadventure with a local named Bob. All I will say is that if you ever go to Zanzibar and meet Bob, slowly walk in the opposite direction.
3. Egypt. One word, HOT. Very hot, and I live in KSA so I know what I'm talking about. Other than that, it was great. The pyramids in Cairo, the temples in Luxor, the Nile. Everything you ever wanted to do or see in Egypt and we managed in three days.
So after an amazing two weeks vacation through Africa I got back to KAUST thinking, life is good and this job made that trip possible, so if A = B and B = C then clearly A = C and this job is great. Right? Wrong.
I arrived to an admissions nightmare. While I can't really go through the details (not allowed) I can say this, I have never worked in this type of environment. The s**t had hit the fan and we were all scattering around to try to clean it up. What a mess. My vacation high wore off within a matter of hours and I soon remembered why I had so desperately needed that vacation to begin with. I also then began to focus on the fact that I had another vacation coming up soon.
So on to why yours truly is an idiot.
Well, in all of the madness that was admissions a friend of mine asked me if I wanted to play squash. I had never played squash before, but it sounded like a great idea. So we coordinated to meet at 7pm on the squash courts at the gym. By 7:10pm, my lesson had begun. I was learning that unlike tennis, the squash ball does not really bounce so you have to run like hell to swing at it on time. I was also learning all about what is in, what is out and how you serve (none of which seemed particularly difficult in theory, but proved to be an arduous task). After my lesson, we started to volley a bit so that I would get the swing of things before we actually started to play. Well it seems as though my hand to eye coordination isn't so bad because I was actually hitting the ball about 90% of the time.
In all of this excitement I ran to catch a ball, hit it and then tried to run out of the way so that it wouldn't hit me. This turned out to be a bad idea. I ran into the wall with my hand behind my back and successfully hit my back with my watch and the wall. The accident was stupid (and as a result so am I) and for a bit I really didn't think it had been a big deal. That was, until I tried to sit down and couldn't. So here am I trying to sit down next the squash courts while my friend is telling me I'm fine, when someone from the gym walks by and asks me if I'm ok. I explain that I have hurt my back and he says (in a panicky type voice) "don't move ma'am. I will go get the physical therapist!" Even though I was having a hard time finding a comfortable way to sit down, I still didn't think this was a big deal. Well, five minutes later, the man had come back with three other people in tow. "Can you lay down?" "Where does it hurt?" "How did you fall?" "Did you lose consciousness?" All at once. Suffice to say, at this point I'm beginning to worry.
"We have to call 911." WHAT?!!! No, please don't call 911, I don't want to go the clinic (and I don't trust that clinic!). "Sorry, ma'am but it's procedure, they'll be here in a minute and will take you to the clinic in a stretcher." Is the stretcher really necessary? I mean can't I just walk to the ambulance? "No, you have to be immobilized. You hurt your back and we have to be very careful." Wonderful.
The EMTs arrive. Both men, both (bless them) clueless. Again they ask me, "can you lay down?" No. "Ok, then we will have to put this brace on you while you sit and then we will move to you to the back board on the stretcher." Oh joy, they put on a brace, put a collar around my neck and tape me up to some contraption so that I was "immobilized." Well, there is just one problem. I am female, they are male. They are not supposed to touch me. The brace was loose, so much for immobilization. They then try to move me to the stretcher, where again they try to lay me flat, I scream. "Ok, keep your legs up." We then begin the five minute attempt to get the stretcher up and mobile. The pain is starting to build, I am starting to cry. Everyone is starting to get more nervous, me included.
A group has gathered to watch me be rolled out of the gym, on a stretcher, taped to some immobilization thing with a neck collar and everything. "This is not why they call it squash" a friend says to me. I laugh. It hurts.
We arrive in the clinic. I am ushered to the "ER." A room of curtain-type rooms, we are the only ones there. Again, they have to move me. I brace for the pain. This time the doctor is in charge, the move is not as painful as I had envisioned. Hurray for small victories. No more ridiculous tape, neck brace or spine brace thingy. By now, I have tears streaming down my cheeks, yes it hurts, but I'm also freaking out. They give me morphine through an IV, say it should work almost immediately. It doesn't. My friends begin to arrive. Word has spread of my accident. I love my friends.
The medical history questionnaire: "How old are you?" 28. "Any allergies?" Not that I know of. "Are you married yet?" (Yet?!) No. "So you can't be pregnant" I guess not.
Ok, now the doctor. She seemed very nice. Told me she understood what I was feeling, she too had been without her family when she was studying in Canada for eight years. I think she was being condescending, but that could be a lost in translation moment or the drugs, who knows. I am being moved to radiology, they need to take x-rays to make sure nothing is broken. So they move me. We arrive in radiology, another clueless guy. They move me onto yet another bed for the x-ray, this one is really hard. It really hurts. I scream again. DON'T TOUCH ME!!! "Ma'am you need to lie flat." I CAN'T! Hmmm... Finally someone comes, more morphine. Pain continues. Dr comes "you have low threshold for pain, don't you?" (Are you kidding me? This is bedside manner?) I don't respond. "Wait a little for the medication to do it's job." Ten minutes later I'm still in pain but somehow manage to lay flat. X-rays taken. I'm crying. I get moved again.
Back in the "ER." Still crying, still hurts. Friends looking very worried, but everyone telling me I'm going to be ok and I look fine. Liars. I've been crying I know I look like crap, but I love them for trying. Back in my "room" the doctor returns along with the lady from the gym who was been watching out for me this whole time (turns out her mom runs the clinic, but she is currently on vacation). "We are going to give you more medication and then you need to sleep." Ok. She turns to my friends "You guys are going to have to go, she needs to calm down for the medicine to work." They agree, and leave. I try to sleep. Try.
After about an hour, I ask, Can I go home now? "Yes. I will have my driver drive you home" the doctor says to me. "He will be here in 15 min" An hour later, driver finally arrives. It is now almost 2am. I arrive home, in a wheelchair. My friends have moved my mattress to the first floor, it is now neatly made in the middle of my living room. My friend is waiting for me. Again, thank goodness for these people.
It is now almost 3am, I finally lay down and try to get some rest. By 6am I'm still trying...
I'll get to why in a second, but first let's recap the past month or so.
1. Safari! Was amazing, there are over 3,000 pictures to prove it. We saw every animal there is to see and with the exception of the rhino, we saw all of them within 10 feet of our car. My safari compatriots were awesome. We had an incredible time.
2. Zanzibar. Very relaxing, although we did have a couple of misadventure with a local named Bob. All I will say is that if you ever go to Zanzibar and meet Bob, slowly walk in the opposite direction.
3. Egypt. One word, HOT. Very hot, and I live in KSA so I know what I'm talking about. Other than that, it was great. The pyramids in Cairo, the temples in Luxor, the Nile. Everything you ever wanted to do or see in Egypt and we managed in three days.
So after an amazing two weeks vacation through Africa I got back to KAUST thinking, life is good and this job made that trip possible, so if A = B and B = C then clearly A = C and this job is great. Right? Wrong.
I arrived to an admissions nightmare. While I can't really go through the details (not allowed) I can say this, I have never worked in this type of environment. The s**t had hit the fan and we were all scattering around to try to clean it up. What a mess. My vacation high wore off within a matter of hours and I soon remembered why I had so desperately needed that vacation to begin with. I also then began to focus on the fact that I had another vacation coming up soon.
So on to why yours truly is an idiot.
Well, in all of the madness that was admissions a friend of mine asked me if I wanted to play squash. I had never played squash before, but it sounded like a great idea. So we coordinated to meet at 7pm on the squash courts at the gym. By 7:10pm, my lesson had begun. I was learning that unlike tennis, the squash ball does not really bounce so you have to run like hell to swing at it on time. I was also learning all about what is in, what is out and how you serve (none of which seemed particularly difficult in theory, but proved to be an arduous task). After my lesson, we started to volley a bit so that I would get the swing of things before we actually started to play. Well it seems as though my hand to eye coordination isn't so bad because I was actually hitting the ball about 90% of the time.
In all of this excitement I ran to catch a ball, hit it and then tried to run out of the way so that it wouldn't hit me. This turned out to be a bad idea. I ran into the wall with my hand behind my back and successfully hit my back with my watch and the wall. The accident was stupid (and as a result so am I) and for a bit I really didn't think it had been a big deal. That was, until I tried to sit down and couldn't. So here am I trying to sit down next the squash courts while my friend is telling me I'm fine, when someone from the gym walks by and asks me if I'm ok. I explain that I have hurt my back and he says (in a panicky type voice) "don't move ma'am. I will go get the physical therapist!" Even though I was having a hard time finding a comfortable way to sit down, I still didn't think this was a big deal. Well, five minutes later, the man had come back with three other people in tow. "Can you lay down?" "Where does it hurt?" "How did you fall?" "Did you lose consciousness?" All at once. Suffice to say, at this point I'm beginning to worry.
"We have to call 911." WHAT?!!! No, please don't call 911, I don't want to go the clinic (and I don't trust that clinic!). "Sorry, ma'am but it's procedure, they'll be here in a minute and will take you to the clinic in a stretcher." Is the stretcher really necessary? I mean can't I just walk to the ambulance? "No, you have to be immobilized. You hurt your back and we have to be very careful." Wonderful.
The EMTs arrive. Both men, both (bless them) clueless. Again they ask me, "can you lay down?" No. "Ok, then we will have to put this brace on you while you sit and then we will move to you to the back board on the stretcher." Oh joy, they put on a brace, put a collar around my neck and tape me up to some contraption so that I was "immobilized." Well, there is just one problem. I am female, they are male. They are not supposed to touch me. The brace was loose, so much for immobilization. They then try to move me to the stretcher, where again they try to lay me flat, I scream. "Ok, keep your legs up." We then begin the five minute attempt to get the stretcher up and mobile. The pain is starting to build, I am starting to cry. Everyone is starting to get more nervous, me included.
A group has gathered to watch me be rolled out of the gym, on a stretcher, taped to some immobilization thing with a neck collar and everything. "This is not why they call it squash" a friend says to me. I laugh. It hurts.
We arrive in the clinic. I am ushered to the "ER." A room of curtain-type rooms, we are the only ones there. Again, they have to move me. I brace for the pain. This time the doctor is in charge, the move is not as painful as I had envisioned. Hurray for small victories. No more ridiculous tape, neck brace or spine brace thingy. By now, I have tears streaming down my cheeks, yes it hurts, but I'm also freaking out. They give me morphine through an IV, say it should work almost immediately. It doesn't. My friends begin to arrive. Word has spread of my accident. I love my friends.
The medical history questionnaire: "How old are you?" 28. "Any allergies?" Not that I know of. "Are you married yet?" (Yet?!) No. "So you can't be pregnant" I guess not.
Ok, now the doctor. She seemed very nice. Told me she understood what I was feeling, she too had been without her family when she was studying in Canada for eight years. I think she was being condescending, but that could be a lost in translation moment or the drugs, who knows. I am being moved to radiology, they need to take x-rays to make sure nothing is broken. So they move me. We arrive in radiology, another clueless guy. They move me onto yet another bed for the x-ray, this one is really hard. It really hurts. I scream again. DON'T TOUCH ME!!! "Ma'am you need to lie flat." I CAN'T! Hmmm... Finally someone comes, more morphine. Pain continues. Dr comes "you have low threshold for pain, don't you?" (Are you kidding me? This is bedside manner?) I don't respond. "Wait a little for the medication to do it's job." Ten minutes later I'm still in pain but somehow manage to lay flat. X-rays taken. I'm crying. I get moved again.
Back in the "ER." Still crying, still hurts. Friends looking very worried, but everyone telling me I'm going to be ok and I look fine. Liars. I've been crying I know I look like crap, but I love them for trying. Back in my "room" the doctor returns along with the lady from the gym who was been watching out for me this whole time (turns out her mom runs the clinic, but she is currently on vacation). "We are going to give you more medication and then you need to sleep." Ok. She turns to my friends "You guys are going to have to go, she needs to calm down for the medicine to work." They agree, and leave. I try to sleep. Try.
After about an hour, I ask, Can I go home now? "Yes. I will have my driver drive you home" the doctor says to me. "He will be here in 15 min" An hour later, driver finally arrives. It is now almost 2am. I arrive home, in a wheelchair. My friends have moved my mattress to the first floor, it is now neatly made in the middle of my living room. My friend is waiting for me. Again, thank goodness for these people.
It is now almost 3am, I finally lay down and try to get some rest. By 6am I'm still trying...
Monday, June 21, 2010
Marine Conservation is a Family Affair
This week I was in Phuket, Thailand. This was my second trip to Thailand, but my first visit to Phuket. The flight there was long. I flew Jeddah-Dubai-Bangkok-Phuket. In Dubai I had to fortuitous opportunity to crash in the Emirates First Class lounge (as it turns out, my manager’s brother works for the airline and while I was flying cattle class, at least I was able to wait for my next flight in style.
The arrival in Bangkok was less relaxing. Upon arrival I was greeted by one of the Emirates staff with a placard that had my flight information on it. She looked me, quite exasperated, and said “you have 20 minutes to make your flight!” What? I thought I had like an hour! Ok, where is my flight leaving from? “The other side of the airport. You’d better run.” And run I did, like 900 m, from one end of the airport to other, with a short stop for immigration in between. I arrived at the gate, panting for air, and the gate was pretty much empty. My flight was not, in fact, scheduled to leave for another 45 minutes. Oh well, at least I got some semblance of a work out.
Phuket is lovely. I was staying at a hotel in Phuket town, which is not near the beach. It’s actually about 45 minutes from the beach, much to my disappointment. I was fortunate that there were several KAUST people at the conference I was attending (they were presenting, I was sitting outside at a KAUST table, in the shadows).
I did meet many of the KAUSTians for dinner on the night of my arrival and we went out to watch some of the soccer matches. We found an English pub to watch the Germany game (three of the people I was with are German) and watched them lose. The Italian and I were trying not to laugh too hard. We then had dinner at a local restaurant where I was able to rekindle my love for Thai food. Green curry, shrimp, soup, papaya salad… yum.
The next day we went to the beach. Yes, we took a 45-minute tuk-tuk taxi ride to Kata beach, because “cata has to go to Kata beach” (they thought they were being so clever). At that was everything there is love about Thailand. The water was clear, people were surfing, families enjoying the sun, tourists, and locals all intermingled in a very relaxed environment of fun, sand, sea, and more Thai food
Then, day one of the conference. I woke up early, and set up the table. I was surprised to see conference attendees with their children in tow. I guess Coral Reef conservation is family affair after all. Although, I can’t imagine a conference (even with pretty pictures of fish) would be fun for a child, but then again, maybe they have different sensibilities than I did as a child (or even now). I have to say that “manning the table” at these conferences is really quite boring. I basically get to sit at a table and smile like a moron at everyone that walks by. Most of these people look very confused when I try to make eye contact and even though I have all of this great stuff to give away, they are looked almost scared to approach the table. Maybe, it’s me. Maybe, it’s KAUST. Who knows?
The arrival in Bangkok was less relaxing. Upon arrival I was greeted by one of the Emirates staff with a placard that had my flight information on it. She looked me, quite exasperated, and said “you have 20 minutes to make your flight!” What? I thought I had like an hour! Ok, where is my flight leaving from? “The other side of the airport. You’d better run.” And run I did, like 900 m, from one end of the airport to other, with a short stop for immigration in between. I arrived at the gate, panting for air, and the gate was pretty much empty. My flight was not, in fact, scheduled to leave for another 45 minutes. Oh well, at least I got some semblance of a work out.
Phuket is lovely. I was staying at a hotel in Phuket town, which is not near the beach. It’s actually about 45 minutes from the beach, much to my disappointment. I was fortunate that there were several KAUST people at the conference I was attending (they were presenting, I was sitting outside at a KAUST table, in the shadows).
I did meet many of the KAUSTians for dinner on the night of my arrival and we went out to watch some of the soccer matches. We found an English pub to watch the Germany game (three of the people I was with are German) and watched them lose. The Italian and I were trying not to laugh too hard. We then had dinner at a local restaurant where I was able to rekindle my love for Thai food. Green curry, shrimp, soup, papaya salad… yum.
The next day we went to the beach. Yes, we took a 45-minute tuk-tuk taxi ride to Kata beach, because “cata has to go to Kata beach” (they thought they were being so clever). At that was everything there is love about Thailand. The water was clear, people were surfing, families enjoying the sun, tourists, and locals all intermingled in a very relaxed environment of fun, sand, sea, and more Thai food
Then, day one of the conference. I woke up early, and set up the table. I was surprised to see conference attendees with their children in tow. I guess Coral Reef conservation is family affair after all. Although, I can’t imagine a conference (even with pretty pictures of fish) would be fun for a child, but then again, maybe they have different sensibilities than I did as a child (or even now). I have to say that “manning the table” at these conferences is really quite boring. I basically get to sit at a table and smile like a moron at everyone that walks by. Most of these people look very confused when I try to make eye contact and even though I have all of this great stuff to give away, they are looked almost scared to approach the table. Maybe, it’s me. Maybe, it’s KAUST. Who knows?
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Primping and Prepping...
Today I went to get my legs waxed. This might not seem terribly exciting but it got me thinking about a couple of things.
First off, I thought about the torture that women subject themselves to (I mean who really wants to have hot wax applied to your skin and ripped off with a piece of cloth?). However, as a woman who does subject herself to such torture, I must admit that I have a love/hate relationship with the whole ritual. Perhaps I have been brainwashed by society into thinking that one standard of beauty applies, and that standard is hairless legs, but regardless, there is nothing quite like walking out of the salon and feeling like your legs look like a million bucks (even when in reality they are covered in a million little red dots). I also really like the idea that someone else (who can actually see the back of my legs) is making sure that every last piece of unwanted hair has been removed. I do not like the pain that comes with the removal of hair in what must seem to many like a barbaric thing to do to yourself, but in truth the pain subsides and after a while all you can focus on are those shorts you haven't worn in a while because you "couldn't" (that is, of course, if you are allowed to wear shorts at all).
Secondly, I thought about the beauty parlor itself. Beauty parlors in Saudi are quite interesting. First off, they have no windows (or all of the windows have been covered) which makes you almost feel like you are walking into a cave. The reason the block out their windows is so that the women inside could "uncover" (meaning remove an abaya, hijab or niqab) if they so choose without having to worry about the prying eyes of men. To me it just adds to this odd feminine mystique that is all things Saudi. Women are not supposed to do anything to attract the attention of men, they are not meant to look attractive so that men will not have impure thoughts about them. Thus the covering of windows at a beauty parlor. I mean, heaven forbid that men think of a woman making herself look nice, even less getting her legs waxed, that would have him thinking about her legs!!! Oh dear. So then, why have a beauty parlor at all? Ah, well that is so that women can get all nice and pretty for each other and for their husbands.
Finally, I though about the women who work in the beauty parlor. Beauty parlors are probably the only retail place you will find women working (with the exception of very few lingerie stores). This is of course, because the women will be in "indecent" situations while in the beauty parlor and as such only other women should be allowed to see. The women that I've met who work there are not from Saudi, they come from places like the Philippines or India. In both cases they are women who are on fixed contracts for two years and have left family (and even children) back home to make money here in the Kingdom. I can't even imagine what that must be like. These are women that are not allowed to take a day off (unless they are very, very ill) and basically shuttled from one cave (their segregated houses) to another cave (the windowless beauty parlor). They are soft spoken and clearly very afraid to speak their minds. It does not take much to imagine how homesick they must be and how hard it must be for them to be working in a country that considers them the lowest of the low (one for being women and two because of where they are from and what they do). People who work in the service industry are poorly treated in this place and it shows on their faces.
When I think about how much harder these women have it, it makes me ashamed to complain. But I guess in the end we are all dealing with many of the same problems. We are all learning to live and work in a country and within a culture that is completely foreign to us and where no one really wants to take the time to explain. So it' up to us to navigate (sometimes with no map or compass) the vastness that is living in Saudi, while desperately reminding ourselves that it will all be worth it in the end.
First off, I thought about the torture that women subject themselves to (I mean who really wants to have hot wax applied to your skin and ripped off with a piece of cloth?). However, as a woman who does subject herself to such torture, I must admit that I have a love/hate relationship with the whole ritual. Perhaps I have been brainwashed by society into thinking that one standard of beauty applies, and that standard is hairless legs, but regardless, there is nothing quite like walking out of the salon and feeling like your legs look like a million bucks (even when in reality they are covered in a million little red dots). I also really like the idea that someone else (who can actually see the back of my legs) is making sure that every last piece of unwanted hair has been removed. I do not like the pain that comes with the removal of hair in what must seem to many like a barbaric thing to do to yourself, but in truth the pain subsides and after a while all you can focus on are those shorts you haven't worn in a while because you "couldn't" (that is, of course, if you are allowed to wear shorts at all).
Secondly, I thought about the beauty parlor itself. Beauty parlors in Saudi are quite interesting. First off, they have no windows (or all of the windows have been covered) which makes you almost feel like you are walking into a cave. The reason the block out their windows is so that the women inside could "uncover" (meaning remove an abaya, hijab or niqab) if they so choose without having to worry about the prying eyes of men. To me it just adds to this odd feminine mystique that is all things Saudi. Women are not supposed to do anything to attract the attention of men, they are not meant to look attractive so that men will not have impure thoughts about them. Thus the covering of windows at a beauty parlor. I mean, heaven forbid that men think of a woman making herself look nice, even less getting her legs waxed, that would have him thinking about her legs!!! Oh dear. So then, why have a beauty parlor at all? Ah, well that is so that women can get all nice and pretty for each other and for their husbands.
Finally, I though about the women who work in the beauty parlor. Beauty parlors are probably the only retail place you will find women working (with the exception of very few lingerie stores). This is of course, because the women will be in "indecent" situations while in the beauty parlor and as such only other women should be allowed to see. The women that I've met who work there are not from Saudi, they come from places like the Philippines or India. In both cases they are women who are on fixed contracts for two years and have left family (and even children) back home to make money here in the Kingdom. I can't even imagine what that must be like. These are women that are not allowed to take a day off (unless they are very, very ill) and basically shuttled from one cave (their segregated houses) to another cave (the windowless beauty parlor). They are soft spoken and clearly very afraid to speak their minds. It does not take much to imagine how homesick they must be and how hard it must be for them to be working in a country that considers them the lowest of the low (one for being women and two because of where they are from and what they do). People who work in the service industry are poorly treated in this place and it shows on their faces.
When I think about how much harder these women have it, it makes me ashamed to complain. But I guess in the end we are all dealing with many of the same problems. We are all learning to live and work in a country and within a culture that is completely foreign to us and where no one really wants to take the time to explain. So it' up to us to navigate (sometimes with no map or compass) the vastness that is living in Saudi, while desperately reminding ourselves that it will all be worth it in the end.
Monday, June 7, 2010
In Preparation for Landing...
... in Africa, there are many preparations that need to take place when one is getting ready to go on safari. In most cases, these steps would be considered a bit of a nuisance to get done but would not really cause much problems. I, however, do not live in the world of "most cases," I live in Saudi. And as I have discovered, things in Saudi have their own way of working.
After getting my yellow fever vaccine in France, the doctor there asked me what I was going to do about preventing malaria. To be perfectly frank, I had figured, I grew up in countries with malaria and never had a problem so I hadn't really planned on anything, but I told the good doctor that I wasn't sure. "You have to get a prescription for anti-malaria pills. They are a must for someone going on a trip like yours." Ok, I thought, I'll ask the doctor in Saudi when I get back. That seemed to put the doctor at ease and he let me go.
Upon arrival at KAUST I called the clinic and made an appointment to get my anti-malaria pill prescription. I showed up on time, paid in advance for my consultation and patiently waited for the doctor to see me. She called me into a room where I sat on a chair and explained that I was going on safari in Tanzania and I needed anti-malaria pills. "When are you leaving?" she asked. I told her my flight leaves the 24th. "Good! You are the first person to ask for these pills in time." Great! So she explained to me that what she was prescribing for me was a pill I needed to take once a week, starting two weeks before my trip, during the length of my trip, and eight weeks after my trip. So a total of 12 weeks of medication. Sounds like a lot of poison, I thought, but ok. She pulls up my file on her computer and notes "Patient going on safari. Prescribed X drug for malaria prophylaxis."
So I go to the pharmacy, get my prescription and go to work. At work, I go online, just to make sure that the doctor has given me the right medication (as I've mentioned in previous posts, the health care system in Saudi is well... not perfect. Fortunately it is also very cheap...). Well, good thing I did. According the CDC website, the main ingredient in the pills she had prescribed was the one thing the malaria in Tanzania is resistant to. So I call the clinic again and ask to speak to the doctor. I explain to the doctor that I have looked up the pills on the CDC website and that I can't take these pills because the malaria in Tanzania is resistant to them. "Oh, you're going to TANZANIA! In that case, can you come back? I can prescribe something else."
I excuse myself from work, go back to the clinic and see the doctor again. She had also pulled up the CDC website and was trying to figure out which of the medicines they recommend is actually available in Saudi. Fortunately, there is one. She tells me that I will have to start taking this pills two days before my trip and take them everyday while on the trip and for four weeks after I return. She pulls up my chart on her computer and adds a note in my file that says "Patient going to Tennessee, with medication X resistant malaria, prescribing medication Y." I didn't realize that Tennessee was in Africa, much less that it had drug resistant malaria, but I figured I'd let that one go.
At least the medication I have now is on the CDC website as something I should be taking. It also, however, says that this medication can cause nausea, vomiting, sensitivity to sunlight, and in some cases can cause severe allergic reactions, vision changes and discoloration of teeth. And it's not even guaranteed to prevent malaria! So, we'll see how this goes.
After getting my yellow fever vaccine in France, the doctor there asked me what I was going to do about preventing malaria. To be perfectly frank, I had figured, I grew up in countries with malaria and never had a problem so I hadn't really planned on anything, but I told the good doctor that I wasn't sure. "You have to get a prescription for anti-malaria pills. They are a must for someone going on a trip like yours." Ok, I thought, I'll ask the doctor in Saudi when I get back. That seemed to put the doctor at ease and he let me go.
Upon arrival at KAUST I called the clinic and made an appointment to get my anti-malaria pill prescription. I showed up on time, paid in advance for my consultation and patiently waited for the doctor to see me. She called me into a room where I sat on a chair and explained that I was going on safari in Tanzania and I needed anti-malaria pills. "When are you leaving?" she asked. I told her my flight leaves the 24th. "Good! You are the first person to ask for these pills in time." Great! So she explained to me that what she was prescribing for me was a pill I needed to take once a week, starting two weeks before my trip, during the length of my trip, and eight weeks after my trip. So a total of 12 weeks of medication. Sounds like a lot of poison, I thought, but ok. She pulls up my file on her computer and notes "Patient going on safari. Prescribed X drug for malaria prophylaxis."
So I go to the pharmacy, get my prescription and go to work. At work, I go online, just to make sure that the doctor has given me the right medication (as I've mentioned in previous posts, the health care system in Saudi is well... not perfect. Fortunately it is also very cheap...). Well, good thing I did. According the CDC website, the main ingredient in the pills she had prescribed was the one thing the malaria in Tanzania is resistant to. So I call the clinic again and ask to speak to the doctor. I explain to the doctor that I have looked up the pills on the CDC website and that I can't take these pills because the malaria in Tanzania is resistant to them. "Oh, you're going to TANZANIA! In that case, can you come back? I can prescribe something else."
I excuse myself from work, go back to the clinic and see the doctor again. She had also pulled up the CDC website and was trying to figure out which of the medicines they recommend is actually available in Saudi. Fortunately, there is one. She tells me that I will have to start taking this pills two days before my trip and take them everyday while on the trip and for four weeks after I return. She pulls up my chart on her computer and adds a note in my file that says "Patient going to Tennessee, with medication X resistant malaria, prescribing medication Y." I didn't realize that Tennessee was in Africa, much less that it had drug resistant malaria, but I figured I'd let that one go.
At least the medication I have now is on the CDC website as something I should be taking. It also, however, says that this medication can cause nausea, vomiting, sensitivity to sunlight, and in some cases can cause severe allergic reactions, vision changes and discoloration of teeth. And it's not even guaranteed to prevent malaria! So, we'll see how this goes.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Lyon (Part Deux)
Day 2: The day was less exciting, but it did start with “pain au chocolat” and hot cocoa. I basically got to sit at the entrance to this conference all day and watch people walk by. There were a few that came and looked quizzically at me and the brochures on the table, but upon realizing that I don’t speak French and that everything on my table was in English they were less interested in me and the information I could provide and just took the freebies. Oh, the life of the admissions officer.
The day ended with dinner at the top of the opera house in Lyon, with a beautiful view of Lyon City Hall and the “two hills of Lyon.” As they explained, there is “the hill that prays,” which is home to the basilica I had already visited in addition to other monasteries and convents, and “the hill that works,” which houses Lyon’s textile industry. Apparently, Lyon is the silk capital of France and as such this second hill has all the textile workshops.
Dinner itself was fairly uneventful. As it turns out the Nobel Laureate is quite the movie buff and grew up in Philadelphia, so we got to talking a bit. He is definitely a scientist and has that spiral way of thinking that seems to the norm among the super smart scientists that I know. It’s like they are thinking of so many things at once that they need to talk about them at once as well. It certainly keeps the conversations interesting.
Day 3: I again started the day with “pain au chocolat” but this time added Orangina. We were off to the conference again. Fortunately for me, I had a small break. I got to go to the hospital here in Lyon to get my yellow fever shot for my safari later this month. As it turns out, getting vaccines in KSA is quite difficult and the yellow fever vaccine is one of the hardest. I called the clinic on KAUST’s campus, which explained that they didn’t have the permit to distribute that vaccine. In fact, there was only one hospital in Jeddah that had those rights. I called that hospital, and just my luck, they had run out. Thus my visit to the Red Cross while in France.
Fortunately for me, one of the conference’s organizers came with me so that I had someone translate the forms and the many questions that I was being asked. Turns out, not a lot of people in Lyon go on safari in Tanzania, so a got a couple of confused looks. My favorite part was one of the questions on the forms. The question itself is pretty straight forward, “Where will you be staying?” My answer however, not as straight forward “Adventure,” which I took to mean camping in a safari type of situation and I thought just sounded like the best explanation of what I hope that trip will be.
The day ended well. After the conference I was able to go back to downtown Lyon and walk around a bit more (and of course take more pictures). I also walked into a wine store and bought myself a bottle of wine (I highly recommend the Bourgogne Hautes Cotes de Nuits). I walked back from Lyon to my hotel, strolling down the banks of the Rhone river. It was glorious. I fabulous way to say au revoir to a city that had treated me very well.
Day 4 (Back in black): What should have been an eventful day turned into a bit of a experience. I arrived at the Lyon airport about 1.45 hours before my flight and went to the check in counter/computer to check-in. "No ticket found" the computer tells me, so a friendly flight ticketing agent tells me to go up to the desk. I do. The agent takes my passport and my printed e-ticket confirmation (given to me by the KAUST travel agency) and starts typing on her computer. She pauses and starts talking to the person next to her in French, all I got was "ticket not found." She looks up at me and says, "did you change your ticket?" Not really, the agency had changed it for me over a week ago, but the new ticket had been confirmed and she was holding all of the information I had. "Ok" she says, and goes back to her computer.
She then looks at me and explains that while the confirmation and ticket number are valid, she can't seem to find me in the system. I proceed to call the travel agency in KSA and tell them what's going on, they insist that I should be in the system and proceed to give me all the numbers I already have (ticket number, confirmation code, flight info...) I look at the ticket agent, while she picks up the phone, more french and "no ticket found." Again she looks up at me, smiles and goes back to the computer. She then stands up, says "I'll be right back. I have to talk to my colleague," and leaves. Ten minutes later, she returns and goes back to the computer. Again, she picks up the phone, more french. Another ticket agent comes to the desk. More french, the first agent goes through the computer process with the second agent, "no ticket found." They both look at me and smile.
The second agent tells me to follow her to another desk. I do. She tells me again that they can't seem to find me in the system. I'm starting to worry, it's been almost 1 hour and my flight is supposed to leave in about 40 min. Finally a third ticket agent comes up, she must be the woman in charge because she takes all of my paperwork, looks at me and proceeds to yet another desk. She starts her computer thing, "I have found the problem. Do you know why there are two tickets in your name?" There shouldn't be, but unfortunately I'm not terribly surprised. "Don't worry. We will get you on this flight, but you should contact your travel agency and make sure they don't charge you for two flights because this is not your fault." She then smiles at me, takes my luggage and (hurray!) hands me a boarding pass.
The flights themselves were normal. However, once again, upon arriving at the boarding gate in Frankfurt the atmosphere clearly changed. Mostly men, and the few women there didn't seem terribly happy. "Welcome back to hell" some guy tells me when we get on the shuttle bus on our way to the airplane. Great, the craziness has already begun I think to myself.
The flight lands, and I'm back in my black abaya... Home... well for now.
The day ended with dinner at the top of the opera house in Lyon, with a beautiful view of Lyon City Hall and the “two hills of Lyon.” As they explained, there is “the hill that prays,” which is home to the basilica I had already visited in addition to other monasteries and convents, and “the hill that works,” which houses Lyon’s textile industry. Apparently, Lyon is the silk capital of France and as such this second hill has all the textile workshops.
Dinner itself was fairly uneventful. As it turns out the Nobel Laureate is quite the movie buff and grew up in Philadelphia, so we got to talking a bit. He is definitely a scientist and has that spiral way of thinking that seems to the norm among the super smart scientists that I know. It’s like they are thinking of so many things at once that they need to talk about them at once as well. It certainly keeps the conversations interesting.
Day 3: I again started the day with “pain au chocolat” but this time added Orangina. We were off to the conference again. Fortunately for me, I had a small break. I got to go to the hospital here in Lyon to get my yellow fever shot for my safari later this month. As it turns out, getting vaccines in KSA is quite difficult and the yellow fever vaccine is one of the hardest. I called the clinic on KAUST’s campus, which explained that they didn’t have the permit to distribute that vaccine. In fact, there was only one hospital in Jeddah that had those rights. I called that hospital, and just my luck, they had run out. Thus my visit to the Red Cross while in France.
Fortunately for me, one of the conference’s organizers came with me so that I had someone translate the forms and the many questions that I was being asked. Turns out, not a lot of people in Lyon go on safari in Tanzania, so a got a couple of confused looks. My favorite part was one of the questions on the forms. The question itself is pretty straight forward, “Where will you be staying?” My answer however, not as straight forward “Adventure,” which I took to mean camping in a safari type of situation and I thought just sounded like the best explanation of what I hope that trip will be.
The day ended well. After the conference I was able to go back to downtown Lyon and walk around a bit more (and of course take more pictures). I also walked into a wine store and bought myself a bottle of wine (I highly recommend the Bourgogne Hautes Cotes de Nuits). I walked back from Lyon to my hotel, strolling down the banks of the Rhone river. It was glorious. I fabulous way to say au revoir to a city that had treated me very well.
Day 4 (Back in black): What should have been an eventful day turned into a bit of a experience. I arrived at the Lyon airport about 1.45 hours before my flight and went to the check in counter/computer to check-in. "No ticket found" the computer tells me, so a friendly flight ticketing agent tells me to go up to the desk. I do. The agent takes my passport and my printed e-ticket confirmation (given to me by the KAUST travel agency) and starts typing on her computer. She pauses and starts talking to the person next to her in French, all I got was "ticket not found." She looks up at me and says, "did you change your ticket?" Not really, the agency had changed it for me over a week ago, but the new ticket had been confirmed and she was holding all of the information I had. "Ok" she says, and goes back to her computer.
She then looks at me and explains that while the confirmation and ticket number are valid, she can't seem to find me in the system. I proceed to call the travel agency in KSA and tell them what's going on, they insist that I should be in the system and proceed to give me all the numbers I already have (ticket number, confirmation code, flight info...) I look at the ticket agent, while she picks up the phone, more french and "no ticket found." Again she looks up at me, smiles and goes back to the computer. She then stands up, says "I'll be right back. I have to talk to my colleague," and leaves. Ten minutes later, she returns and goes back to the computer. Again, she picks up the phone, more french. Another ticket agent comes to the desk. More french, the first agent goes through the computer process with the second agent, "no ticket found." They both look at me and smile.
The second agent tells me to follow her to another desk. I do. She tells me again that they can't seem to find me in the system. I'm starting to worry, it's been almost 1 hour and my flight is supposed to leave in about 40 min. Finally a third ticket agent comes up, she must be the woman in charge because she takes all of my paperwork, looks at me and proceeds to yet another desk. She starts her computer thing, "I have found the problem. Do you know why there are two tickets in your name?" There shouldn't be, but unfortunately I'm not terribly surprised. "Don't worry. We will get you on this flight, but you should contact your travel agency and make sure they don't charge you for two flights because this is not your fault." She then smiles at me, takes my luggage and (hurray!) hands me a boarding pass.
The flights themselves were normal. However, once again, upon arriving at the boarding gate in Frankfurt the atmosphere clearly changed. Mostly men, and the few women there didn't seem terribly happy. "Welcome back to hell" some guy tells me when we get on the shuttle bus on our way to the airplane. Great, the craziness has already begun I think to myself.
The flight lands, and I'm back in my black abaya... Home... well for now.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Lyon
Day 1: My excitement reached an all time high when I finally got in the taxi that was going to take me to the airport in Jeddah. There had been no last minute cancellation or change of plans! I was actually going to be able to leave the kingdom and do some recruiting!
So finally I reached the airport and well let me just say that it is quite surprising that an airport that gets so many international visitor (because of its proximity to Mecca) is so, well, blah. First off, you arrive at the ticket counters and there are blobs of people, no lines or cues, no order, really just a cluster of people (mostly men, because the women are all sitting off to one side somewhere) who are talking very loudly (in Arabic of course). So I finally manage to weasel my way through the crowds and arrive at the table. Apparently, Air France has a “one bag per flight” rule and I had two bags. Fortunately for me, I was probably the first single female traveler the airline attendant had dealt with in a while, so he took pity on me and let me check both my suitcase and the case for my stand.
Great, make through immigration and special “ladies only” search line and arrive at the waiting area. This place is well, reminiscent of a bad bus station. There are not enough seats for everyone, and to make matters worse, as a woman you are not really supposed to sit next to a man you don’t know. So, what did I do? I leaned up again a wall somewhere and waited for someone to get up. When someone finally did, I sat down. Five minutes after sitting down, one the professors from KAUST found and invited me to the first class lounge.
“The place is useless” he says, but takes one look around at our waiting area and adds “but it’s better than this.” So off we go to the first class lounge. He wasn’t kidding. The place is basically what most waiting areas in normal airports would look like, plus a little room for smokers and a terrible little food display. We sat there, ate our less than appetizing chocolate cake and waited for them to call the plane. Finally the call our plane to board, we do and we are off!
The flights themselves were uneventful and I arrived in Lyon at 8:30am, right on time. One of the organizers for the conference I was attending met me there and gave me a ride to the hotel. She explained that the hotel was not downtown (which according to her was quite a ways away) but that it was next to a lovely park and that I could always take the tram or the bus to reach ”Old Lyon.” I have to admit that the drive itself was beautiful. I had forgotten how much I love seeing green and trees, and realized how much I had missed nature! Fortunately for me, this is end of spring in Lyon, so everything is in full bloom and the days are brisk and sunny. Perfect weather for someone from the dessert.
I checked into my hotel, took a quick shower and went to the lobby to ask how to get downtown. The concierge explained that I needed to catch the bus until the last stop. I hopped on the bus and hoped that I had gotten on the right bus and that we were headed in the right direction (the concierge proved harder to understand than I expected). Well we turned the corner and there was the Rhone River. Wow, the buildings that line the river are stunning! The bus ride took all of 15 min, and I had arrived in Old Lyon at the main square.
I took my camera out and didn’t put it away until I got back on the bus on my way to the hotel. What a gorgeous city! I thought I wanted to go shopping, because it’s not really something you can do in KSA, but one look at the architecture and design of this World Heritage Site, and all I wanted to do was walk around and take pictures. So I did.
I got lost in the old city, walking down cobble stone streets and up and down little alleys with ivy-covered walls. I had lunch at a sidewalk café and ordered wine (hurray!) and a cheese plate, and was blissfully happy to just sit there and people watch. I have to say that people in Lyon have a very peculiar sense of style, it’s somewhere between the 80’s (I saw both Hammer pants and a flock of seagulls haircut) and haute couture. Lots of fun to watch. Lots of roman sandals.
After lunch I walked across the city to the Saone River and looked up at the Basilica Notre-Dame-du-Fourviere. Which looked beautiful off in the distance and thought to myself, “there has to be a way to get up there.” And there was.
What felt like a million stairs later… I was there. I walked into the Basilica and I have to admit that my eyes watered. I was overwhelmed. First off the place is gorgeous, but secondly, I hadn’t stepped into a church since I moved to Saudi. I had forgotten the awe that being in a place like instills in me. I felt peace and comfort in a way that I had missed but yet forgotten. It was a great experience to just sit there and be quiet for a while, surrounded by history and faith.
After my spiritual re-connection, I walked down the gardens of the basilica and made my way to the John Paul Cathedral, also a stunning church, although not quite as ornate or mesmerizing as the Basilica. I then continued to walk around Lyon, taking pictures like a crazy woman (I have about 300 pictures to prove it). I ended my personal tour by walking back to Rhone, jumping on the bus back and arriving at the park behind my hotel. It was lovely. The park has a lake in the middle of it and is covered in flowers. It was just so nice to be able to walk around on grass and see people wearing normal clothes (not an abaya in sight!) laying on the grass reading a book. I realized that much of what I miss is summed up in the little things that you don’t really think about when they’re available to you.
After my walk, I went back to my hotel room took a nap and got ready for dinner. I was fortunate to attend dinner at Paul Bocuse, which is apparently a very well known restaurant run by a very famous chef. At dinner I met the 2001 Chemistry Nobel Laureate, who was the keynote speaker at the conference I was attending. The dinner itself was exquisitely rich and decadent and consisted of 6 courses! During the meal we actually got to meet the chef’s wife and the chef himself.
So finally I reached the airport and well let me just say that it is quite surprising that an airport that gets so many international visitor (because of its proximity to Mecca) is so, well, blah. First off, you arrive at the ticket counters and there are blobs of people, no lines or cues, no order, really just a cluster of people (mostly men, because the women are all sitting off to one side somewhere) who are talking very loudly (in Arabic of course). So I finally manage to weasel my way through the crowds and arrive at the table. Apparently, Air France has a “one bag per flight” rule and I had two bags. Fortunately for me, I was probably the first single female traveler the airline attendant had dealt with in a while, so he took pity on me and let me check both my suitcase and the case for my stand.
Great, make through immigration and special “ladies only” search line and arrive at the waiting area. This place is well, reminiscent of a bad bus station. There are not enough seats for everyone, and to make matters worse, as a woman you are not really supposed to sit next to a man you don’t know. So, what did I do? I leaned up again a wall somewhere and waited for someone to get up. When someone finally did, I sat down. Five minutes after sitting down, one the professors from KAUST found and invited me to the first class lounge.
“The place is useless” he says, but takes one look around at our waiting area and adds “but it’s better than this.” So off we go to the first class lounge. He wasn’t kidding. The place is basically what most waiting areas in normal airports would look like, plus a little room for smokers and a terrible little food display. We sat there, ate our less than appetizing chocolate cake and waited for them to call the plane. Finally the call our plane to board, we do and we are off!
The flights themselves were uneventful and I arrived in Lyon at 8:30am, right on time. One of the organizers for the conference I was attending met me there and gave me a ride to the hotel. She explained that the hotel was not downtown (which according to her was quite a ways away) but that it was next to a lovely park and that I could always take the tram or the bus to reach ”Old Lyon.” I have to admit that the drive itself was beautiful. I had forgotten how much I love seeing green and trees, and realized how much I had missed nature! Fortunately for me, this is end of spring in Lyon, so everything is in full bloom and the days are brisk and sunny. Perfect weather for someone from the dessert.
I checked into my hotel, took a quick shower and went to the lobby to ask how to get downtown. The concierge explained that I needed to catch the bus until the last stop. I hopped on the bus and hoped that I had gotten on the right bus and that we were headed in the right direction (the concierge proved harder to understand than I expected). Well we turned the corner and there was the Rhone River. Wow, the buildings that line the river are stunning! The bus ride took all of 15 min, and I had arrived in Old Lyon at the main square.
I took my camera out and didn’t put it away until I got back on the bus on my way to the hotel. What a gorgeous city! I thought I wanted to go shopping, because it’s not really something you can do in KSA, but one look at the architecture and design of this World Heritage Site, and all I wanted to do was walk around and take pictures. So I did.
I got lost in the old city, walking down cobble stone streets and up and down little alleys with ivy-covered walls. I had lunch at a sidewalk café and ordered wine (hurray!) and a cheese plate, and was blissfully happy to just sit there and people watch. I have to say that people in Lyon have a very peculiar sense of style, it’s somewhere between the 80’s (I saw both Hammer pants and a flock of seagulls haircut) and haute couture. Lots of fun to watch. Lots of roman sandals.
After lunch I walked across the city to the Saone River and looked up at the Basilica Notre-Dame-du-Fourviere. Which looked beautiful off in the distance and thought to myself, “there has to be a way to get up there.” And there was.
What felt like a million stairs later… I was there. I walked into the Basilica and I have to admit that my eyes watered. I was overwhelmed. First off the place is gorgeous, but secondly, I hadn’t stepped into a church since I moved to Saudi. I had forgotten the awe that being in a place like instills in me. I felt peace and comfort in a way that I had missed but yet forgotten. It was a great experience to just sit there and be quiet for a while, surrounded by history and faith.
After my spiritual re-connection, I walked down the gardens of the basilica and made my way to the John Paul Cathedral, also a stunning church, although not quite as ornate or mesmerizing as the Basilica. I then continued to walk around Lyon, taking pictures like a crazy woman (I have about 300 pictures to prove it). I ended my personal tour by walking back to Rhone, jumping on the bus back and arriving at the park behind my hotel. It was lovely. The park has a lake in the middle of it and is covered in flowers. It was just so nice to be able to walk around on grass and see people wearing normal clothes (not an abaya in sight!) laying on the grass reading a book. I realized that much of what I miss is summed up in the little things that you don’t really think about when they’re available to you.
After my walk, I went back to my hotel room took a nap and got ready for dinner. I was fortunate to attend dinner at Paul Bocuse, which is apparently a very well known restaurant run by a very famous chef. At dinner I met the 2001 Chemistry Nobel Laureate, who was the keynote speaker at the conference I was attending. The dinner itself was exquisitely rich and decadent and consisted of 6 courses! During the meal we actually got to meet the chef’s wife and the chef himself.
Monday, May 31, 2010
TGIJ!
Thank goodness it's (practically) June!!! May, not my favorite month so far, but June holds the promise of very good things to come :)
First off, I'm headed to Lyon, France tomorrow evening and will be there for three days. I will working at a conference on Thursday and Friday, but will actually have all of Wednesday to peruse the wonders of this French city, eat a baguette, drink some wine and potentially even go shopping. How cool is that? This will be my first trip out of the Middle East since I arrived in early January and to say that I'm excited is the understatement of the century. I can hardly contain my excitement. It's been an arduous and difficult couple of months and with my health being less than optimal lately, I have been well, pretty down (as I'm sure my last couple of posts can attest). I am happy to say, however, that I finally see the light at the end of the tunnel and that light is June!
After Lyon, I will be back in KSA for about 10 days and then I'm headed to Phuket, Thailand for about week for another conference. Yes, you are allowed to be jealous ;) but it's about time that I actually get to do some of the travel I was promised when I was hired. Thailand should be a relaxed (and potentially even slow) couple of days but will still be a good way to unwind before my safari!
That's right people, on June 24th I will be headed to Tanzania to go on safari! After much talk of going to Africa, I will finally get to experience the dream and go on safari. It will be a four day extravaganza, followed by a couple of days in Zanzibar and then a couple of days in Egypt (I still haven't seen the pyramids, so I figured, why not?).
Suffice to say, June couldn't come fast enough and now that's it's practically upon us, I am giddy. I am hopeful that this month will be the "recharging of batteries" that I need. I am hopeful that it will be.
First off, I'm headed to Lyon, France tomorrow evening and will be there for three days. I will working at a conference on Thursday and Friday, but will actually have all of Wednesday to peruse the wonders of this French city, eat a baguette, drink some wine and potentially even go shopping. How cool is that? This will be my first trip out of the Middle East since I arrived in early January and to say that I'm excited is the understatement of the century. I can hardly contain my excitement. It's been an arduous and difficult couple of months and with my health being less than optimal lately, I have been well, pretty down (as I'm sure my last couple of posts can attest). I am happy to say, however, that I finally see the light at the end of the tunnel and that light is June!
After Lyon, I will be back in KSA for about 10 days and then I'm headed to Phuket, Thailand for about week for another conference. Yes, you are allowed to be jealous ;) but it's about time that I actually get to do some of the travel I was promised when I was hired. Thailand should be a relaxed (and potentially even slow) couple of days but will still be a good way to unwind before my safari!
That's right people, on June 24th I will be headed to Tanzania to go on safari! After much talk of going to Africa, I will finally get to experience the dream and go on safari. It will be a four day extravaganza, followed by a couple of days in Zanzibar and then a couple of days in Egypt (I still haven't seen the pyramids, so I figured, why not?).
Suffice to say, June couldn't come fast enough and now that's it's practically upon us, I am giddy. I am hopeful that this month will be the "recharging of batteries" that I need. I am hopeful that it will be.
Friday, May 21, 2010
Not So Talented
This past weekend was the first ever KAUST Talent Show. Granted, so many things are the "first ever" because this is the university's first year in existence. Regardless, a talent show might sound like something quite inane and even high school-ish to many but here in KSA it's downright vanguard! I participated and lost. I've never lost a talent show before, but at this one I didn't even place among the top three (and there were only 13 acts mind you). So it got me to thinking about what is talent and how do we recognize it.
There have been quite a few things this past week that might be come under the definition of "not so talented." First off, we can talk about maintenance here at KAUST, but before we do we should probably discuss the construction of the houses we are forced to live in. Many of you may not know, but KAUST was built in about a year. The whole place (which is quite large) was built in under 12 months. As a result, things were sloppily put together and hastily (if not haphazardly) done so that the university would be functional by opening day (which was sometime early September 2009). What we are seeing now are the results of what was a rush job. Many of the houses that were designed for staff were deemed unlivable and were torn down, which is why I am currently in student housing. Granted, the housing looks nice and on the surface it seems quite lovely. I live in a bi-level one bedroom apartment with two bathrooms, a living/dining room and a study area. However, once you live here for a few weeks you start to notice the cracks in walls (both figuratively and literally). Things just don't have the craftsmanship that you would expect from a new apartment building. I am actually one of the lucky ones, my housing issues have been minimal when compared to some of my friends, but this blog is not about them...
So on to maintenance. I noticed earlier this week that the ceiling above my kitchen was looking a little damp that seemed to have mold growing on it. I called maintenance to tell them that I had a leak. The first thing they asked me, was "where is the leak coming from ma'am? Is it the A/C or the plumbing?" Now, how the expected me to know this is still a mystery to me, so I explained that I had not actually looked in my ceiling and as such was unsure what the source of the leak was. They said they would send someone over immediately. I should mention that when I called them, I was at work so I had to tell them that I would be unavailable until 5pm, they did not seem very amused by this. So 5pm rolls around and I rush home. I arrive at my apartment and there is now a leak. I wait. Finally at about 5:50pm three men knock on my door, I let them in they look in my ceiling and say "ma'am this is an A/C problem and we are with plumbing, we can't fix this. We will have A/C come." Great, I respond, what time will that be? "Probably around 7:30pm?" What?! I had purposefully called asking that someone show up at 5pm so that I wouldn't have to stay in my apartment all day. They looked at each other, at the order slip in their hands and then at me, "ma'am you said 5pm, it says 5pm." Yes, thank you, and what time is it now? "Oh, ok, ma'am, we understand." I'm not entirely sure they did, but ok. 8pm rolls around and I get a call "sorry ma'am but the A/C people have left for the day, can they come tomorrow morning?" No, I work. "Ok can they come before 5pm?" No, I work. "Ok, ma'am they will be there at 5pm"
Next day, I again rush home from work at 5pm. This time at 5:15pm the A/C guys show up. There are two of them. One of them promptly gets on a ladder and starts to soak up the leak that has obviously left quite the puddle in there. He uses a rag, which he hands to his partner who wrings it in the sink. This takes about 30 min. Once this is done, the first man looks at me and says "ok ma'am we have to go to dinner now, we'll be back at 8pm." Huh? You've been here 30 min and now you have to leave for two hours? Great, how much longer do you think you'll be? "Could be two hours ma'am" Lovely. But what was I going to do, tell them not to eat dinner? So they leave, I call maintenance and give them a piece of my mind, poor operator guy didn't really know how to respond to me... Oh well. Finally 8pm, they come back and "fix" my leak by basically taping a rubber tube around whatever was leaking in my ceiling. They were using "special A/C duct tape" but let's be perfectly honest, it's still tape. I'm skeptical that the problem has been fixed.
And so I go back to my question, what is talent? I realize that it is probably not the maintenance workers' fault that the work is shoddy, they probably don't even know any better. So who's job is it to help them? Or is a matter of talent? Are they really just bad at what they do, but they are willing to do it, so why question it?
In writing this entry, I realize how superficial this may sound and how really we've all had our share of less-than-ideal landlords and maintenance crews. But what makes this a tough pill to swallow is that I have to deal with maintenance as often as I do and this apartment was built less than six months ago. But again, I have it pretty good, my leak was minimal. My apartment has not flooded, my ceiling did not cave in, I have hot water and no rats (all of which have happened to friends of mine).
As with everything, even daily living has become an adventure and while I came here knowing that things would be different and hard, this is certainly not what I had envisioned my life would be like. Talented or not, bring on tomorrow.
There have been quite a few things this past week that might be come under the definition of "not so talented." First off, we can talk about maintenance here at KAUST, but before we do we should probably discuss the construction of the houses we are forced to live in. Many of you may not know, but KAUST was built in about a year. The whole place (which is quite large) was built in under 12 months. As a result, things were sloppily put together and hastily (if not haphazardly) done so that the university would be functional by opening day (which was sometime early September 2009). What we are seeing now are the results of what was a rush job. Many of the houses that were designed for staff were deemed unlivable and were torn down, which is why I am currently in student housing. Granted, the housing looks nice and on the surface it seems quite lovely. I live in a bi-level one bedroom apartment with two bathrooms, a living/dining room and a study area. However, once you live here for a few weeks you start to notice the cracks in walls (both figuratively and literally). Things just don't have the craftsmanship that you would expect from a new apartment building. I am actually one of the lucky ones, my housing issues have been minimal when compared to some of my friends, but this blog is not about them...
So on to maintenance. I noticed earlier this week that the ceiling above my kitchen was looking a little damp that seemed to have mold growing on it. I called maintenance to tell them that I had a leak. The first thing they asked me, was "where is the leak coming from ma'am? Is it the A/C or the plumbing?" Now, how the expected me to know this is still a mystery to me, so I explained that I had not actually looked in my ceiling and as such was unsure what the source of the leak was. They said they would send someone over immediately. I should mention that when I called them, I was at work so I had to tell them that I would be unavailable until 5pm, they did not seem very amused by this. So 5pm rolls around and I rush home. I arrive at my apartment and there is now a leak. I wait. Finally at about 5:50pm three men knock on my door, I let them in they look in my ceiling and say "ma'am this is an A/C problem and we are with plumbing, we can't fix this. We will have A/C come." Great, I respond, what time will that be? "Probably around 7:30pm?" What?! I had purposefully called asking that someone show up at 5pm so that I wouldn't have to stay in my apartment all day. They looked at each other, at the order slip in their hands and then at me, "ma'am you said 5pm, it says 5pm." Yes, thank you, and what time is it now? "Oh, ok, ma'am, we understand." I'm not entirely sure they did, but ok. 8pm rolls around and I get a call "sorry ma'am but the A/C people have left for the day, can they come tomorrow morning?" No, I work. "Ok can they come before 5pm?" No, I work. "Ok, ma'am they will be there at 5pm"
Next day, I again rush home from work at 5pm. This time at 5:15pm the A/C guys show up. There are two of them. One of them promptly gets on a ladder and starts to soak up the leak that has obviously left quite the puddle in there. He uses a rag, which he hands to his partner who wrings it in the sink. This takes about 30 min. Once this is done, the first man looks at me and says "ok ma'am we have to go to dinner now, we'll be back at 8pm." Huh? You've been here 30 min and now you have to leave for two hours? Great, how much longer do you think you'll be? "Could be two hours ma'am" Lovely. But what was I going to do, tell them not to eat dinner? So they leave, I call maintenance and give them a piece of my mind, poor operator guy didn't really know how to respond to me... Oh well. Finally 8pm, they come back and "fix" my leak by basically taping a rubber tube around whatever was leaking in my ceiling. They were using "special A/C duct tape" but let's be perfectly honest, it's still tape. I'm skeptical that the problem has been fixed.
And so I go back to my question, what is talent? I realize that it is probably not the maintenance workers' fault that the work is shoddy, they probably don't even know any better. So who's job is it to help them? Or is a matter of talent? Are they really just bad at what they do, but they are willing to do it, so why question it?
In writing this entry, I realize how superficial this may sound and how really we've all had our share of less-than-ideal landlords and maintenance crews. But what makes this a tough pill to swallow is that I have to deal with maintenance as often as I do and this apartment was built less than six months ago. But again, I have it pretty good, my leak was minimal. My apartment has not flooded, my ceiling did not cave in, I have hot water and no rats (all of which have happened to friends of mine).
As with everything, even daily living has become an adventure and while I came here knowing that things would be different and hard, this is certainly not what I had envisioned my life would be like. Talented or not, bring on tomorrow.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Mother's Day
Today is Mother's Day and I have been thinking a lot of about my mom and all the mothers I know and would like to take this opportunity to thank them for everything they have done. In fact, I would like to extend my thanks to all the motherly figures that have influenced my life. From the friends who have acted like a mother when I needed a shoulder to cry on or a person to vent with. To the women who have shown me what it means to love your friends and loved ones unconditionally and support them in everything they do (regardless of how ridiculously stupid they might think that is). I want to congratulate all of my friends who have recently become mothers and to those that will soon be mothers, I know that your children are lucky to have you! Te doy las gracias a ti mamá por siempre estar de mi lado aunque estes lejos, no creo que serÃa capaz de seguir aquà sin tu apoyo.
There is certainly something unique about mothers and the comfort they bring. I have been having a rough time here lately and as a result really miss my mom (and dad and sister) and all the other comforting people in my life. Not to say that I don't have people here to care about me, but that bond or connection that I have built with many of you over countless conversations, months and years that I just don't have here (yet, I hope). It's also hard that I live in a country where giving (or being given) a hug could be offensive, and for me (which as you all know loves hugs) that's been particularly difficult. Just another thing to get used to and learn to adapt. There are other ways to show people you care and I guess I just have to learn to embrace those...
In the meantime, I guess you could say I'm homesick. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I also miss so many little things that I used take for granted, like driving or getting proper produce. I knew that life here would be hard, but I guess you never really know how hard until you're here. So on this Mother's Day I hope you all take some time to thank the mothers in your life who have helped you get to where you are and will be there to cheer you on when you get to where you're going.
Happy Mother's Day everyone!
There is certainly something unique about mothers and the comfort they bring. I have been having a rough time here lately and as a result really miss my mom (and dad and sister) and all the other comforting people in my life. Not to say that I don't have people here to care about me, but that bond or connection that I have built with many of you over countless conversations, months and years that I just don't have here (yet, I hope). It's also hard that I live in a country where giving (or being given) a hug could be offensive, and for me (which as you all know loves hugs) that's been particularly difficult. Just another thing to get used to and learn to adapt. There are other ways to show people you care and I guess I just have to learn to embrace those...
In the meantime, I guess you could say I'm homesick. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I also miss so many little things that I used take for granted, like driving or getting proper produce. I knew that life here would be hard, but I guess you never really know how hard until you're here. So on this Mother's Day I hope you all take some time to thank the mothers in your life who have helped you get to where you are and will be there to cheer you on when you get to where you're going.
Happy Mother's Day everyone!
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Complacently Happy
At what point is complacency and happiness the same thing? I'm not going to sit here and say that I'm overjoyed about where my life has led me, but at the same time I can't really say that I'm unhappy. And so I pose the question, is there a point in your life (once you become an adult and embrace all that brings) that just being content is actually the mark of happiness? Or is it that I have become so cynical that things just don't quite seem to reach my ever growing expectations? Is there something wrong in reaching for the moon, and if you can't actually get there do you really end up among the stars?
How many stars have I met with in my quest for the moon? When I was growing up I never imagined that I would be 28 years old, single and living in the Middle East. My life has had more twist and turns than I could have ever expected and while I don't regret the decisions that I have made and where they have led me, there are times when I wonder if I would be just as happy (if not happier) had I chosen to do things differently. Granted, I will concede that there is no point in dwelling on the past and thinking of what might have or could have been, but there comes a point in everyone's life where you turn around and really examine what you have done to get to where you are. I guess the next logical step would be to think about where you want to go next. What are the steps you need to take in order to get your there? And here again I arrive at the daunting realization that most of my life has been a series of unexpected events that I could have never really planned for and certainly didn't account for, so what then, would be the point of my starting a plan now when all my past plans didn't quite pan out?
This introspective mood that I find myself in today also makes me think about what it means to happy as an expat, woman, non-muslim living in KSA. I attended another consulate party this weekend and it got me thinking: 'here are a group of foreigners all brought together by the allure of alcohol and the illusion of "normal".' But again I find myself asking what is normal? Yes, this was a pool party and the women were (gasp) wearing bikinis! And there were (gasp) mojitos, and (double gasp) daiquiris that were not virgin! And let's be perfectly honest, that is why people went. It's certainly not the horrendous "bbq" food or the music (which I still think is the same play list that was has been playing at the last two consulate events that I've attended), but it's for the sense that this is what we would be doing "at home." Hanging out with friends (and new acquaintances) and having a drink.
It has to be said, that because these parties don't happen very often, there is probably more drinking than there should be. In fact, these parties remind me of college binge drinking in many ways. It's like going to a frat party where everyone is in the late 20's and early 30's, bizarre but true. You still have your "frat brothers" trying to hit on anything or anyone, and your "sorority sisters" wearing way too much make-up and way too little clothes. And of course, like any good college party, there is that group of "neither here nor there" people who just kind sit back and watch the rest of the party attendees making fools of themselves. Were we actually back home, we would all find these parties incredibly boring and perhaps even a little immature.
But getting back to the point, at what point do we consider this type of behavior normal? And what is normal behavior anyway? I live in a country where I this type of behavior would be considered highly inappropriate, and yet have learned that some people in this country have parties that are way more outlandish (I have not attended one of such parties). Is there a double standard or a sense of hypocrisy somewhere in all of these rules and regulations so that while in public everyone is set to behave one way, behind closed doors all rules are forgotten?
It's interesting to think about the many standards, code and regulations that this country abides by and how they are divided by religion and gender (and even nationality). I guess in a way there is something about living in a world defined by rules that makes people all the more eager to break them while pretending that life has (and should) always be like this. So again I ask, where is the line between complacency and happiness?
How many stars have I met with in my quest for the moon? When I was growing up I never imagined that I would be 28 years old, single and living in the Middle East. My life has had more twist and turns than I could have ever expected and while I don't regret the decisions that I have made and where they have led me, there are times when I wonder if I would be just as happy (if not happier) had I chosen to do things differently. Granted, I will concede that there is no point in dwelling on the past and thinking of what might have or could have been, but there comes a point in everyone's life where you turn around and really examine what you have done to get to where you are. I guess the next logical step would be to think about where you want to go next. What are the steps you need to take in order to get your there? And here again I arrive at the daunting realization that most of my life has been a series of unexpected events that I could have never really planned for and certainly didn't account for, so what then, would be the point of my starting a plan now when all my past plans didn't quite pan out?
This introspective mood that I find myself in today also makes me think about what it means to happy as an expat, woman, non-muslim living in KSA. I attended another consulate party this weekend and it got me thinking: 'here are a group of foreigners all brought together by the allure of alcohol and the illusion of "normal".' But again I find myself asking what is normal? Yes, this was a pool party and the women were (gasp) wearing bikinis! And there were (gasp) mojitos, and (double gasp) daiquiris that were not virgin! And let's be perfectly honest, that is why people went. It's certainly not the horrendous "bbq" food or the music (which I still think is the same play list that was has been playing at the last two consulate events that I've attended), but it's for the sense that this is what we would be doing "at home." Hanging out with friends (and new acquaintances) and having a drink.
It has to be said, that because these parties don't happen very often, there is probably more drinking than there should be. In fact, these parties remind me of college binge drinking in many ways. It's like going to a frat party where everyone is in the late 20's and early 30's, bizarre but true. You still have your "frat brothers" trying to hit on anything or anyone, and your "sorority sisters" wearing way too much make-up and way too little clothes. And of course, like any good college party, there is that group of "neither here nor there" people who just kind sit back and watch the rest of the party attendees making fools of themselves. Were we actually back home, we would all find these parties incredibly boring and perhaps even a little immature.
But getting back to the point, at what point do we consider this type of behavior normal? And what is normal behavior anyway? I live in a country where I this type of behavior would be considered highly inappropriate, and yet have learned that some people in this country have parties that are way more outlandish (I have not attended one of such parties). Is there a double standard or a sense of hypocrisy somewhere in all of these rules and regulations so that while in public everyone is set to behave one way, behind closed doors all rules are forgotten?
It's interesting to think about the many standards, code and regulations that this country abides by and how they are divided by religion and gender (and even nationality). I guess in a way there is something about living in a world defined by rules that makes people all the more eager to break them while pretending that life has (and should) always be like this. So again I ask, where is the line between complacency and happiness?
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Searching for giants...
Three months, wow, it's already been three months since I started this craziness and I'm still here. There have been ups and downs. Moments of sheer panic, utter foolishness and lots of laughter. I've learned a lot about myself, who I want to be and how I'm going to get there. Living in Saudi has given me a new appreciation for things I would have otherwise taken for granted. In the end, these three months have flown by and I'm actually excited about what lies ahead. This has not been at all what I imagined, but then again what good story ever is?
I passed my probationary period and celebrated by going scuba diving in the Red Sea. Our quest? To find whale sharks. And so we set off to the mystical land that is called Al-Lith, which is only about three hours south of KAUST. The drive was fairly uneventful, except for the camel in the middle of the road that we and the other two cars in our little caravan of diving aficionados almost hit!
Once we arrive at the "resort" which was really more like a Motel 6 (clean, decent but very very very basic), we had a quick lunch and then all piled into a large boat. There was going to be a lot of diving and fun in the sun to be had and we couldn't wait to get started.
On the boat we headed out for about 40 min and went on our first dive of the weekend. The diving itself wasn't spectacular, but we did see a lot of really cool stuff. We saw two large "crown of thorns" starfish, three eels (one big, one medium, one small), lots of coral (that was awake and moving like I've never seen before), huge clams, a blue spotted ray and tons of baby fish everywhere. True to form, I don't like having my picture taken.
After the dive we all got super excited because a whale shark was spotted not far from where we were. We dashed like crazy people to get there, but unfortunately, by the time we arrive the whale shark had had enough of people as was nowhere to be found. We did however get to see quite the sunset on the Red Sea.
The day ended well, although not with the high we had hoped for. We got back to the "resort," had dinner and all went to bed dreaming of the whale shark we had not seen.
The next morning we woke up at 6:30am, had a quick breakfast and were on the boat by 7am. We had decided to go to a dive site which was about 1.5 hours away and wanted to get there before the water got cloudy. About 30 min into the ride, we get a radio call. A whale shark had been spotted! Again we dash like crazy people and this time, joy! We were able to see it, swim with it and basically hang out with a baby (3.5 meter long) whale shark for about 45 min. What a phenomenal experience. The whale was completely unfazed by the fact that 18 people were crowding around it like lunatics, all desperately trying to get a "good view." It is a majestic creature that basically just swam around and ate plankton, seemingly unaware that we were even there. I can safely say, that this was one of those moments I will never forget (and I would be willing to bet that everyone there would say the same).
After swimming with the giant we had been searching for, all of us were thrilled. The day simply could not have started off better and could have ended right there and we all still would have been happy. But it did not end there. After the whale shark snorkeling adventure we still proceeded to our scuba diving destination and were greeted by dolphins on the way there. There is something just so special about dolphins that whenever I see them they just make me smile. It's like they were congratulating us on a job well done. Joining in our little celebration that our weekend search had already been successful.
Once we arrive at the site, we all went right in. The dive was better than the one from the day before but again, nothing that I though warranted a wow. Then again, after the whale shark few things were going to make me say wow. We saw more giants clams, a tiny orange, blue, black and white sea slug and an octopus. After the dive we proceeded to lunch on an island with a random Bedouin tent.
The water was so clear I, for a second, forgot where I was and imagined myself back in the Caribbean. We got to walk around the island (which actually had real sand, something that is not often found in Saudi). After lunch, we went out on a second dive, had a great time, saw dragon fish, another blue spotted ray and other lovely sea creatures. The day ended with a fond farewell from another group of dolphins and a manta ray sighting.
The drive back was actually a lot smoother than I had anticipated and we did get to see one of Saudi's classic sunsets.
Overall it was a fantastic weekend, a great way to round out my probation and realize that even in Saudi there are great adventures to be had.
I passed my probationary period and celebrated by going scuba diving in the Red Sea. Our quest? To find whale sharks. And so we set off to the mystical land that is called Al-Lith, which is only about three hours south of KAUST. The drive was fairly uneventful, except for the camel in the middle of the road that we and the other two cars in our little caravan of diving aficionados almost hit!
On the boat we headed out for about 40 min and went on our first dive of the weekend. The diving itself wasn't spectacular, but we did see a lot of really cool stuff. We saw two large "crown of thorns" starfish, three eels (one big, one medium, one small), lots of coral (that was awake and moving like I've never seen before), huge clams, a blue spotted ray and tons of baby fish everywhere. True to form, I don't like having my picture taken.
After the dive we all got super excited because a whale shark was spotted not far from where we were. We dashed like crazy people to get there, but unfortunately, by the time we arrive the whale shark had had enough of people as was nowhere to be found. We did however get to see quite the sunset on the Red Sea.
The day ended well, although not with the high we had hoped for. We got back to the "resort," had dinner and all went to bed dreaming of the whale shark we had not seen.
The next morning we woke up at 6:30am, had a quick breakfast and were on the boat by 7am. We had decided to go to a dive site which was about 1.5 hours away and wanted to get there before the water got cloudy. About 30 min into the ride, we get a radio call. A whale shark had been spotted! Again we dash like crazy people and this time, joy! We were able to see it, swim with it and basically hang out with a baby (3.5 meter long) whale shark for about 45 min. What a phenomenal experience. The whale was completely unfazed by the fact that 18 people were crowding around it like lunatics, all desperately trying to get a "good view." It is a majestic creature that basically just swam around and ate plankton, seemingly unaware that we were even there. I can safely say, that this was one of those moments I will never forget (and I would be willing to bet that everyone there would say the same).
After swimming with the giant we had been searching for, all of us were thrilled. The day simply could not have started off better and could have ended right there and we all still would have been happy. But it did not end there. After the whale shark snorkeling adventure we still proceeded to our scuba diving destination and were greeted by dolphins on the way there. There is something just so special about dolphins that whenever I see them they just make me smile. It's like they were congratulating us on a job well done. Joining in our little celebration that our weekend search had already been successful.
Once we arrive at the site, we all went right in. The dive was better than the one from the day before but again, nothing that I though warranted a wow. Then again, after the whale shark few things were going to make me say wow. We saw more giants clams, a tiny orange, blue, black and white sea slug and an octopus. After the dive we proceeded to lunch on an island with a random Bedouin tent.
The water was so clear I, for a second, forgot where I was and imagined myself back in the Caribbean. We got to walk around the island (which actually had real sand, something that is not often found in Saudi). After lunch, we went out on a second dive, had a great time, saw dragon fish, another blue spotted ray and other lovely sea creatures. The day ended with a fond farewell from another group of dolphins and a manta ray sighting.
The drive back was actually a lot smoother than I had anticipated and we did get to see one of Saudi's classic sunsets.
Overall it was a fantastic weekend, a great way to round out my probation and realize that even in Saudi there are great adventures to be had.
Friday, April 2, 2010
Abu Dhabi et al.
It has been much too long since my last post and there have been a ton of things that have happened, so I'll dive right in:
Speaking of diving I finally went scuba diving in the Red Sea. It was a night dive and it was gorgeous. I went with a group of mostly faculty members who all turned out to be guys. So not only was I the only one in the group that does not have a PhD (yet) but I was also the only one who has to wear an abaya to get to the beach. The guys, however, were all great and because I was the only girl there made sure I was all set. Between them they helped me (and by help I mean they did it for me) set up my gear, get in and out of the water and made sure I was always ok during the dive. The dive itself was a lot of fun! But for some reason of five new flashlights that been purchased for the dive, four of them went out ten minutes into the dive (including mine and my dive buddy's) so we all basically had to dive as a large group of eight.
During the dive we noticed bio luminescent plankton, lots of fish, beautiful coral and even cuttle fish. I hadn't been diving in almost five years, so I was a little nervous to get back in the water (and even more because it was at night) but as soon as I was under, it was like I was one with the water once again. I had so much fun.
Here are some pictures of the group, getting ready and what we saw once we were in the water:
In addition to my deep sea adventure I also had the opportunity to visit Abu Dhabi last weekend. This was my first time out of the kingdom since arriving in the Middle East and I must say that after seeing UAE I've realized that KSA is probably as "Middle East" as it gets. Everything else is more the the "light" version.
Let me explain, first off, you don't have to wear an abaya. While I have made my peace with the abaya and can understand why some women find in liberating, I still think of it like a black sack. However, in Abu Dhabi you saw women in shorts! Maybe I've been in KSA for too long, but I was almost shocked to see some of what the people were wearing. Again, this is probably due to the fact that the only thing I knew about the Middle East is what I have experienced here in KSA and at KAUST. And even while KAUST is as liberal as KSA can be, it still pales in comparison to other parts of the region.
The city of Abu Dhabi itself is pretty small, and very clean (especially when compared to Jeddah). We were able to walk everywhere (something you wouldn't necessarily do here) and had a great time. I was surprised to see that everyone there follows the rules. The taxi drivers will not speed or stop in the middle of road and you rarely hear someone honk their horn. After being in Jeddah, which is the worst city to drive in, in the worst country to drive in, in the worst region to drive in, you can only imagine how nice it was to see everything work "as it should be." I don't think the cabs in Philly, New York or San Francisco are that organized.
My favorite part of the weekend however, was seeing a dear friend. She moved to Abu Dhabi in August to take a job as a college counselor at an American School there and like me is having a ball but is definitely working on adjusting to life in the Middle East. It was so nice to talk to someone who was going through some of the same issues I was going through, although she is allowed to drive and there is alcohol in UAE. Speaking of alcohol, I had almost forgotten how lovely a good glass of red wine is... but I digress.
We arrived in Abu Dhabi on Wednesday night, and promptly bought all kinds of alcohol at the duty free. I then proceeded to my friends house, where we caught up for a bit but went to bed at a reasonably early hour because she had to go to work the next day (the weekend in UAE is Friday - Saturday unlike KSA's Thursday - Friday). On Thursday I got up after she already left, and so I met up with my KAUST friends (there were a total of nine of us on this trip) and we went to breakfast. We walked along the corniche looking for a place to eat and finally found a place called Colombiano's Coffee (hilarious I know).
After breakfast, we all jumped into cabs and went to see the Abu Dhabi souqs. They were pitiful. I don't know if we have just become accustomed to souqs here in KSA, but the ones in Abu Dhabi were just, well, bad. After the souq, we went to the grand mosque. Wow. It is an absolutely gorgeous place, if you are ever in Abu Dhabi, I would highly recommend visiting. We arrived at the mosque and were told that the women had to wear abayas and head scarfs to get it (they provided us with them, because none of us had thought to bring our own). We walked along the mosque and took pictures (posted below). After the mosque I met up with my friend and we went to dinner. Where my love affair with wine was rekindled and all was right with the world. After dinner we simply chatted for a bit and again went to bed fairly early.
On Friday, I said goodbye to my friend (she was going to a desert resort with her boyfriend) and met up with my friends for breakfast. This time we ended up at a french bakery and were served more food than you can imagine. After breakfast we went to the palace hotel, which is a seven star hotel I think. In order to get on the grounds you have to follow a dress code (no shorts, and no tank tops). The hotel grounds and the hotel itself are really quite something. Then again they should be, the cheapest room is over $1,000 a night! After that we realized that Red Bull was having their air race, so we decided to go the marina mall and watch from there. It was interesting and all, but I guess I'm not much of a plane person so I was an enthralled as others. After the race we stopped at a large supermarket and bought chocolate Easter eggs (you can't find those in KSA). Then dinner and the plane ride home.
This week, was long, as I'm sure you can imagine, but the weekend was delightful. I went windsurfing. I hadn't been windsurfing since I was a kid, but apparently it's like riding a bike, once you learn you never really forget. The wind was pretty negligible, but it was great to relearn how to turn and stand and get the sail to go in the direction I wanted it to. Unfortunately, no pictures allowed on the beach, so you'll just have to take my word for it that I did a pretty good job :)
Speaking of diving I finally went scuba diving in the Red Sea. It was a night dive and it was gorgeous. I went with a group of mostly faculty members who all turned out to be guys. So not only was I the only one in the group that does not have a PhD (yet) but I was also the only one who has to wear an abaya to get to the beach. The guys, however, were all great and because I was the only girl there made sure I was all set. Between them they helped me (and by help I mean they did it for me) set up my gear, get in and out of the water and made sure I was always ok during the dive. The dive itself was a lot of fun! But for some reason of five new flashlights that been purchased for the dive, four of them went out ten minutes into the dive (including mine and my dive buddy's) so we all basically had to dive as a large group of eight.
During the dive we noticed bio luminescent plankton, lots of fish, beautiful coral and even cuttle fish. I hadn't been diving in almost five years, so I was a little nervous to get back in the water (and even more because it was at night) but as soon as I was under, it was like I was one with the water once again. I had so much fun.
Here are some pictures of the group, getting ready and what we saw once we were in the water:
In addition to my deep sea adventure I also had the opportunity to visit Abu Dhabi last weekend. This was my first time out of the kingdom since arriving in the Middle East and I must say that after seeing UAE I've realized that KSA is probably as "Middle East" as it gets. Everything else is more the the "light" version.
Let me explain, first off, you don't have to wear an abaya. While I have made my peace with the abaya and can understand why some women find in liberating, I still think of it like a black sack. However, in Abu Dhabi you saw women in shorts! Maybe I've been in KSA for too long, but I was almost shocked to see some of what the people were wearing. Again, this is probably due to the fact that the only thing I knew about the Middle East is what I have experienced here in KSA and at KAUST. And even while KAUST is as liberal as KSA can be, it still pales in comparison to other parts of the region.
The city of Abu Dhabi itself is pretty small, and very clean (especially when compared to Jeddah). We were able to walk everywhere (something you wouldn't necessarily do here) and had a great time. I was surprised to see that everyone there follows the rules. The taxi drivers will not speed or stop in the middle of road and you rarely hear someone honk their horn. After being in Jeddah, which is the worst city to drive in, in the worst country to drive in, in the worst region to drive in, you can only imagine how nice it was to see everything work "as it should be." I don't think the cabs in Philly, New York or San Francisco are that organized.
My favorite part of the weekend however, was seeing a dear friend. She moved to Abu Dhabi in August to take a job as a college counselor at an American School there and like me is having a ball but is definitely working on adjusting to life in the Middle East. It was so nice to talk to someone who was going through some of the same issues I was going through, although she is allowed to drive and there is alcohol in UAE. Speaking of alcohol, I had almost forgotten how lovely a good glass of red wine is... but I digress.
We arrived in Abu Dhabi on Wednesday night, and promptly bought all kinds of alcohol at the duty free. I then proceeded to my friends house, where we caught up for a bit but went to bed at a reasonably early hour because she had to go to work the next day (the weekend in UAE is Friday - Saturday unlike KSA's Thursday - Friday). On Thursday I got up after she already left, and so I met up with my KAUST friends (there were a total of nine of us on this trip) and we went to breakfast. We walked along the corniche looking for a place to eat and finally found a place called Colombiano's Coffee (hilarious I know).
After breakfast, we all jumped into cabs and went to see the Abu Dhabi souqs. They were pitiful. I don't know if we have just become accustomed to souqs here in KSA, but the ones in Abu Dhabi were just, well, bad. After the souq, we went to the grand mosque. Wow. It is an absolutely gorgeous place, if you are ever in Abu Dhabi, I would highly recommend visiting. We arrived at the mosque and were told that the women had to wear abayas and head scarfs to get it (they provided us with them, because none of us had thought to bring our own). We walked along the mosque and took pictures (posted below). After the mosque I met up with my friend and we went to dinner. Where my love affair with wine was rekindled and all was right with the world. After dinner we simply chatted for a bit and again went to bed fairly early.
On Friday, I said goodbye to my friend (she was going to a desert resort with her boyfriend) and met up with my friends for breakfast. This time we ended up at a french bakery and were served more food than you can imagine. After breakfast we went to the palace hotel, which is a seven star hotel I think. In order to get on the grounds you have to follow a dress code (no shorts, and no tank tops). The hotel grounds and the hotel itself are really quite something. Then again they should be, the cheapest room is over $1,000 a night! After that we realized that Red Bull was having their air race, so we decided to go the marina mall and watch from there. It was interesting and all, but I guess I'm not much of a plane person so I was an enthralled as others. After the race we stopped at a large supermarket and bought chocolate Easter eggs (you can't find those in KSA). Then dinner and the plane ride home.
This week, was long, as I'm sure you can imagine, but the weekend was delightful. I went windsurfing. I hadn't been windsurfing since I was a kid, but apparently it's like riding a bike, once you learn you never really forget. The wind was pretty negligible, but it was great to relearn how to turn and stand and get the sail to go in the direction I wanted it to. Unfortunately, no pictures allowed on the beach, so you'll just have to take my word for it that I did a pretty good job :)
Monday, March 15, 2010
Two months and counting
It’s been just over two months since I arrived in KSA, and slowly the dust has begun to settle and I actually feel like I have a life here. My job right now might not be the most thrilling thing I’ve ever done, but I keep reminding myself that this is a new institution and they are playing their cards very close to their chest. As a result everything has be double, triple and quadruple checked and signed off on before we can move onto the next step. I have also begun to realize that I actually work in a pretty laid back office, which is a pretty new concept to me.
As some of you know, I’ve had my share of job related “difficulties” and while this office is not the model of communication and innovation; I do have to say that there is a real open door policy among the staff. Obviously, the doors only open so high, but it’s still refreshing to see that I am really thought of as a colleague as opposed to an employee. I am the youngest person in my office (even the temps are older than I am), which only makes me think I must have done something right in my short work-life to get here.
The other huge part of being at KAUST is the KAUST community itself. I am surrounded by people from all over the world, most of which are studying in fields that I know nothing about and would probably make my head spin, but it’s amazing to think that all of these people were as crazy as I was and decided to uproot their lives and move to this social experiment in the middle of the Saudi desert. I haven’t met a single person that I actively dislike.
I also have to admit that life here is easy. My routine consists of going to work Sat – Wed, going to the gym (I’m in pretty darn good shape right now), meeting my friends for lunch or dinner and every once in a while going out to Jeddah. The weekends are all about going to the beach (which is on campus) or the pool, or meeting with friends to go back to Jeddah or going snorkeling somewhere or just hang out and watching a movie. If this is what small town living is like, perhaps I’ve been too hard on it the past. I have always said that I’m a big city girl, and I still honestly believe that I am. But there is certainly something to be said about the simplicity of community life. All of your friends live within walking distance, and chances are that if were all brave enough to join this community that you must have something else in common.
There are, of course, lot s of things that I miss about living in the city (any city). I miss the ability to just pick up and go to any restaurant I want (regardless of cuisine) without having to organize transportation. I miss public transportation. I even miss the noise to some extent. But I like the idea that I live in an area where everyone is nice to each other, everyone feels safe and everyone feels connected to everyone else. Sure, sometimes it can feel like I live in Stepford, with the cookie cutter houses and apartments, but even Stepford has its place I guess.
Overall I’d say this has been a positive experience so far. I was assigned to nice bi-level one bedroom apartment with an incredible view. I get to live in a country that most people can’t even come visit, and I’ve learned a lot about the Arabic culture and about myself in the process.
As some of you know, I’ve had my share of job related “difficulties” and while this office is not the model of communication and innovation; I do have to say that there is a real open door policy among the staff. Obviously, the doors only open so high, but it’s still refreshing to see that I am really thought of as a colleague as opposed to an employee. I am the youngest person in my office (even the temps are older than I am), which only makes me think I must have done something right in my short work-life to get here.
The other huge part of being at KAUST is the KAUST community itself. I am surrounded by people from all over the world, most of which are studying in fields that I know nothing about and would probably make my head spin, but it’s amazing to think that all of these people were as crazy as I was and decided to uproot their lives and move to this social experiment in the middle of the Saudi desert. I haven’t met a single person that I actively dislike.
I also have to admit that life here is easy. My routine consists of going to work Sat – Wed, going to the gym (I’m in pretty darn good shape right now), meeting my friends for lunch or dinner and every once in a while going out to Jeddah. The weekends are all about going to the beach (which is on campus) or the pool, or meeting with friends to go back to Jeddah or going snorkeling somewhere or just hang out and watching a movie. If this is what small town living is like, perhaps I’ve been too hard on it the past. I have always said that I’m a big city girl, and I still honestly believe that I am. But there is certainly something to be said about the simplicity of community life. All of your friends live within walking distance, and chances are that if were all brave enough to join this community that you must have something else in common.
There are, of course, lot s of things that I miss about living in the city (any city). I miss the ability to just pick up and go to any restaurant I want (regardless of cuisine) without having to organize transportation. I miss public transportation. I even miss the noise to some extent. But I like the idea that I live in an area where everyone is nice to each other, everyone feels safe and everyone feels connected to everyone else. Sure, sometimes it can feel like I live in Stepford, with the cookie cutter houses and apartments, but even Stepford has its place I guess.
Overall I’d say this has been a positive experience so far. I was assigned to nice bi-level one bedroom apartment with an incredible view. I get to live in a country that most people can’t even come visit, and I’ve learned a lot about the Arabic culture and about myself in the process.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Imposition of Culture?
I want to address some of what I what I touched on when talking about how I view women's role here in the Kingdom. I do, however, understand that to them it is completely normal and most of them are perfectly happy with the arrangement. I understand that my definition of freedom is very different to them and that my culture is completely different to theirs. My observations, were merely that, my observation from my very skewed and biased point of view. I have struggled with the idea that someone could be happy at being (what in my view is) limited in their freedom.
I will re-emphasize that the women here in Saudi seem happy with their role in society. This is even true of Saudi women that I know who have studied in Westernized countries (like US or UK) and have returned home to KSA and still fulfill their role as Saudi women fully and contently. I know that there is something to be said about how people can only see things from their point of view, and I understand that mine is quite different to that of the women here. They don't seem to mind that they can't drive, can't vote, can't walk alone in the streets, can't catch a cab by themselves, can't travel without a male companion, can't wear what they want, can't have their picture taken, and (traditionally) can't study, work or really been seen in public with members of the opposite sex that are not immediate family. They have grown up this way and so to them it's normal. In fact I almost feel that to them, my independence seems odd and even slightly off-putting. Why would I choose to be alone is something they all seem to question. It seems like everyday I get someone who looks at me a with a quizzical slant to their head when I tell them I'm here alone, and no I'm not married or living with my parents.
The role of women here is clearly defined and perhaps that is a good thing. These are women who don't feel the need to go out and prove themselves in the "real world." They are happy knowing that they are taken care of and that they are in control of their dominion (the household). I just wanted to say that is not how I want to live my life. Unlike the women in KSA, I was brought up to think that independence was something to aspire to. That you should go out and work and be on equal footing as anyone else (male or female). I like the idea that I can express myself in anyway I choose (be it clothing, expressions or even who I choose to spend time with). I want to drive and be able to go out in the city by myself and get lost and explore, but I can't. So perhaps my struggle is not me trying to impose my values and culture on Saudi but how Saudi is imposing itself on me.
I will re-emphasize that the women here in Saudi seem happy with their role in society. This is even true of Saudi women that I know who have studied in Westernized countries (like US or UK) and have returned home to KSA and still fulfill their role as Saudi women fully and contently. I know that there is something to be said about how people can only see things from their point of view, and I understand that mine is quite different to that of the women here. They don't seem to mind that they can't drive, can't vote, can't walk alone in the streets, can't catch a cab by themselves, can't travel without a male companion, can't wear what they want, can't have their picture taken, and (traditionally) can't study, work or really been seen in public with members of the opposite sex that are not immediate family. They have grown up this way and so to them it's normal. In fact I almost feel that to them, my independence seems odd and even slightly off-putting. Why would I choose to be alone is something they all seem to question. It seems like everyday I get someone who looks at me a with a quizzical slant to their head when I tell them I'm here alone, and no I'm not married or living with my parents.
The role of women here is clearly defined and perhaps that is a good thing. These are women who don't feel the need to go out and prove themselves in the "real world." They are happy knowing that they are taken care of and that they are in control of their dominion (the household). I just wanted to say that is not how I want to live my life. Unlike the women in KSA, I was brought up to think that independence was something to aspire to. That you should go out and work and be on equal footing as anyone else (male or female). I like the idea that I can express myself in anyway I choose (be it clothing, expressions or even who I choose to spend time with). I want to drive and be able to go out in the city by myself and get lost and explore, but I can't. So perhaps my struggle is not me trying to impose my values and culture on Saudi but how Saudi is imposing itself on me.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
The Mis-Independence of women...
I know that there is something to said about not being responsible for your own actions, but how do you learn anything about who you are if you have no liability? I ask this question because of a conversation that I recently had with a colleague of mine. She explained to me that here in KSA women are not liable for anything that they do, their husbands, fathers or brothers are. She told me that at the company that her father had worked in previously to coming to KAUST, a man had been fired because his daughter was being disruptive.
Now, let's think about that for a second. What does that do to the women who are, technically speaking, free to do anything they want because their male counterparts will take the blame? Well as you might suspect, that gives men even more of a reason to control everything that their women do. And the women listen to their men happily. When this same friend and I went shopping I ran into a group of friends who invited us to dinner. I was happy to eat out and eagerly said yes, inviting my friend to come along, she decline but urged me to go on without her. Not really understanding what was going on, I left for dinner with my friends and met up with her later in the evening. On our way home, she explained to me that she had not joined us for dinner because she had not asked for permission. I should probably point out that she is 30 years old and has a masters degree. I was shocked (for lack of a better word). Here was what I considered an educated woman who was still conforming to the rules we might ask of a child.
So it dawned on me that what I had always considered to be one of a best attributes, my independence, was probably seen as a serious flaw in this country. I have always been proud to say that I have taken care of myself and relied on anyone to get me to where I want to go and where I am. Now, I live in a country where I can walk alone, can't catch a cab alone and can't drive simply because I am a woman and can't be trusted to make decisions on my own (that's what men are for apparently).
The land of abayas has many more hurdles that I had originally thought, in fact, the very fact that the abaya is black while the thawb (the male counterpart to the abaya) is white, speaks volumes of how women are seen and see themselves in this culture. Now, I should probably point out that the women that I have talked to all seem happy with the arrangement. But, I will also admit that I wonder if that is because they just don't know any better or if there is something to not being liable for your actions that is actually freeing.
In the end there is something very powerful about culture, both the Saudi culture and my mixed Latino-American fusion culture. Which is better? Who knows.
Now, let's think about that for a second. What does that do to the women who are, technically speaking, free to do anything they want because their male counterparts will take the blame? Well as you might suspect, that gives men even more of a reason to control everything that their women do. And the women listen to their men happily. When this same friend and I went shopping I ran into a group of friends who invited us to dinner. I was happy to eat out and eagerly said yes, inviting my friend to come along, she decline but urged me to go on without her. Not really understanding what was going on, I left for dinner with my friends and met up with her later in the evening. On our way home, she explained to me that she had not joined us for dinner because she had not asked for permission. I should probably point out that she is 30 years old and has a masters degree. I was shocked (for lack of a better word). Here was what I considered an educated woman who was still conforming to the rules we might ask of a child.
So it dawned on me that what I had always considered to be one of a best attributes, my independence, was probably seen as a serious flaw in this country. I have always been proud to say that I have taken care of myself and relied on anyone to get me to where I want to go and where I am. Now, I live in a country where I can walk alone, can't catch a cab alone and can't drive simply because I am a woman and can't be trusted to make decisions on my own (that's what men are for apparently).
The land of abayas has many more hurdles that I had originally thought, in fact, the very fact that the abaya is black while the thawb (the male counterpart to the abaya) is white, speaks volumes of how women are seen and see themselves in this culture. Now, I should probably point out that the women that I have talked to all seem happy with the arrangement. But, I will also admit that I wonder if that is because they just don't know any better or if there is something to not being liable for your actions that is actually freeing.
In the end there is something very powerful about culture, both the Saudi culture and my mixed Latino-American fusion culture. Which is better? Who knows.
What do you do when there is nothing to do.
Life on KAUST's campus consists of going to work, then going to the gym and finally going to sleep (with a few meals interspersed here and there). Basically we are determined to leave KAUST in good fiscal and physical shape.
So when the announcement came out that the pools were going to be opening this past weekend, I was beyond excited! Granted they were separate men and women's pool, but my apartment faces the men's pool and it's nice! Looks like a 25m pool with lounge chairs and umbrellas for laying out. "Lovely!" I thought, "surely the women's pool will have to be equivalent to that." But, alas, I was wrong.
Where as the men's pool is open, spacious and large, the women's pool is not. It is 10m long at best and is 5ft deep in the shallow end. There are five lounge chairs that fight for the tiny bit of sun that can get through the roof and wall enclosure where the pool is located. And to add insult to injury the pool dress code is one piece suits only! It's all women pool! But the gym staff assured me that is the rule in KSA (I should also add that while she was saying this me a Saudi woman interrupted her and said that this was, in fact, not the case. In the all female pools in Jeddah, the women are allowed to wear whatever they want and that includes two piece bathing suits.)
So, I go to the pool in my one piece bathing suit and attempt to make the best of a less than optimal situation, when suddenly it dawns on me, the women's pool means the mother's pool. Mothers = children and this pool isn't large enough for people who want to swim and children who want to play, and worse the pool is too deep for most children anyway (ok maybe not worse for me who has no children, but you know what I mean).
Oh well, the pool situation was finally resolved when several angry mothers complained (and rightfully so) that the pool was unsafe for young children and that there is a perfectly suitable toddler pool on the men's side. Now the men's pool is a family pool, what that means exactly I'm not sure but it's a good precursor to the beach that is supposed to open this Friday!
You might think that after the pool debacle I would know to curb my enthusiasm about the beach, but again when there isn't much to do or look forward to, you work with what you have. I'll definitely let you know how that works out.
So when the announcement came out that the pools were going to be opening this past weekend, I was beyond excited! Granted they were separate men and women's pool, but my apartment faces the men's pool and it's nice! Looks like a 25m pool with lounge chairs and umbrellas for laying out. "Lovely!" I thought, "surely the women's pool will have to be equivalent to that." But, alas, I was wrong.
Where as the men's pool is open, spacious and large, the women's pool is not. It is 10m long at best and is 5ft deep in the shallow end. There are five lounge chairs that fight for the tiny bit of sun that can get through the roof and wall enclosure where the pool is located. And to add insult to injury the pool dress code is one piece suits only! It's all women pool! But the gym staff assured me that is the rule in KSA (I should also add that while she was saying this me a Saudi woman interrupted her and said that this was, in fact, not the case. In the all female pools in Jeddah, the women are allowed to wear whatever they want and that includes two piece bathing suits.)
So, I go to the pool in my one piece bathing suit and attempt to make the best of a less than optimal situation, when suddenly it dawns on me, the women's pool means the mother's pool. Mothers = children and this pool isn't large enough for people who want to swim and children who want to play, and worse the pool is too deep for most children anyway (ok maybe not worse for me who has no children, but you know what I mean).
Oh well, the pool situation was finally resolved when several angry mothers complained (and rightfully so) that the pool was unsafe for young children and that there is a perfectly suitable toddler pool on the men's side. Now the men's pool is a family pool, what that means exactly I'm not sure but it's a good precursor to the beach that is supposed to open this Friday!
You might think that after the pool debacle I would know to curb my enthusiasm about the beach, but again when there isn't much to do or look forward to, you work with what you have. I'll definitely let you know how that works out.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Un mes...
It has been exactly one month since I arrived in KSA and what a month it has been! I have met a lot of people, and learned a lot about what the expat life is really like. So let me do a quick overview of what has happened in the past month.
We all remember my arrival and pitfalls therein. After which came my abaya shopping adventure (lecherous man included). Then I started work and well, lets be honest, that is pretty much all I've done since, work. Granted, working like a crazy person is normal for admissions at this time of year but you wouldn't think that would be so hard for five people to through 3,000 applications! But IT IS.
First, let's discuss the reading system. I would have thought that considering KAUST has spent all of these billions of dollars getting ready and bringing students and staff from all around the world, they would have invested in a good, solid tested admissions application reading system. Alas, no. They have tried to adapt a business system to fit the needs of admissions. It doesn't. What should only be taking us 10 minutes to do, actually takes closer to 30. I am supposed to have a fairly easy job (at least in the admissions world). All I really have to do is check GRE and TOELF/IELTS score, look at the transcripts and see gpa and coursework and then glance through the Statement of Purpose, the CV, and (if time allows) the Three Letters of Recommendation. Simple enough, no? Well unfortunately, I spend most of my time watching the computer think (a.k.a. the spinning circle of death) while I have to download documents onto my computer so that they can be viewed.
Second, there is no queue, no list on the system that tells me how many files I have to read, have read or are complete. Instead I rely on an excel spreadsheet that is emailed out every week where (hopefully) all the students that have applied to the programs I'm reading are located. I then search for them by application number, determine whether or not the file is complete and then either read the file, and forward it to the faculty committee for decision, or email the student asking them to send me their missing information. Then, naturally, the frantic applicants all send me mountains of application related material that I then have to upload onto their file, so that it can be considered complete and be sent to the faculty for review. Basically there is no real way of knowing how much you've done and how much you still have left to do.
Finally, let's talk about the applications. Now, I realize that reading for Penn made me spoiled. I am used to seeing the absolute best of the best, and have to rethink what a strong application is. However, when you're job consists of "contextualizing" the applications for the faculty, this becomes a little tough. Especially when most of the professors came from places like Stanford and the like and are expecting the same quality of students. So, I have learned the art of "spin" (there are so many people who would be so proud of me) and I hope it's working!
And that in a nutshell has been my life for the last month. I work 10-11 hour work days, six days a week. So, it has been tough to get out and actually see KSA, Jeddah or anything other than my cubicle, my computer, my bed and (on occasion) the gym. I have learned that while it is hard (and expensive) to get an expat here, they are just expendable as the next person. So for now I'll keep my head down, do my job to the best of my ability and continue to hope for the best.
We all remember my arrival and pitfalls therein. After which came my abaya shopping adventure (lecherous man included). Then I started work and well, lets be honest, that is pretty much all I've done since, work. Granted, working like a crazy person is normal for admissions at this time of year but you wouldn't think that would be so hard for five people to through 3,000 applications! But IT IS.
First, let's discuss the reading system. I would have thought that considering KAUST has spent all of these billions of dollars getting ready and bringing students and staff from all around the world, they would have invested in a good, solid tested admissions application reading system. Alas, no. They have tried to adapt a business system to fit the needs of admissions. It doesn't. What should only be taking us 10 minutes to do, actually takes closer to 30. I am supposed to have a fairly easy job (at least in the admissions world). All I really have to do is check GRE and TOELF/IELTS score, look at the transcripts and see gpa and coursework and then glance through the Statement of Purpose, the CV, and (if time allows) the Three Letters of Recommendation. Simple enough, no? Well unfortunately, I spend most of my time watching the computer think (a.k.a. the spinning circle of death) while I have to download documents onto my computer so that they can be viewed.
Second, there is no queue, no list on the system that tells me how many files I have to read, have read or are complete. Instead I rely on an excel spreadsheet that is emailed out every week where (hopefully) all the students that have applied to the programs I'm reading are located. I then search for them by application number, determine whether or not the file is complete and then either read the file, and forward it to the faculty committee for decision, or email the student asking them to send me their missing information. Then, naturally, the frantic applicants all send me mountains of application related material that I then have to upload onto their file, so that it can be considered complete and be sent to the faculty for review. Basically there is no real way of knowing how much you've done and how much you still have left to do.
Finally, let's talk about the applications. Now, I realize that reading for Penn made me spoiled. I am used to seeing the absolute best of the best, and have to rethink what a strong application is. However, when you're job consists of "contextualizing" the applications for the faculty, this becomes a little tough. Especially when most of the professors came from places like Stanford and the like and are expecting the same quality of students. So, I have learned the art of "spin" (there are so many people who would be so proud of me) and I hope it's working!
And that in a nutshell has been my life for the last month. I work 10-11 hour work days, six days a week. So, it has been tough to get out and actually see KSA, Jeddah or anything other than my cubicle, my computer, my bed and (on occasion) the gym. I have learned that while it is hard (and expensive) to get an expat here, they are just expendable as the next person. So for now I'll keep my head down, do my job to the best of my ability and continue to hope for the best.
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