Two months and counting

It’s been just over two months since I arrived in KSA, and slowly the dust has begun to settle and I actually feel like I have a life here. My job right now might not be the most thrilling thing I’ve ever done, but I keep reminding myself that this is a new institution and they are playing their cards very close to their chest. As a result everything has be double, triple and quadruple checked and signed off on before we can move onto the next step. I have also begun to realize that I actually work in a pretty laid back office, which is a pretty new concept to me.

As some of you know, I’ve had my share of job related “difficulties” and while this office is not the model of communication and innovation; I do have to say that there is a real open door policy among the staff. Obviously, the doors only open so high, but it’s still refreshing to see that I am really thought of as a colleague as opposed to an employee. I am the youngest person in my office (even the temps are older than I am), which only makes me think I must have done something right in my short work-life to get here.

The other huge part of being at KAUST is the KAUST community itself. I am surrounded by people from all over the world, most of which are studying in fields that I know nothing about and would probably make my head spin, but it’s amazing to think that all of these people were as crazy as I was and decided to uproot their lives and move to this social experiment in the middle of the Saudi desert. I haven’t met a single person that I actively dislike.

I also have to admit that life here is easy. My routine consists of going to work Sat – Wed, going to the gym (I’m in pretty darn good shape right now), meeting my friends for lunch or dinner and every once in a while going out to Jeddah. The weekends are all about going to the beach (which is on campus) or the pool, or meeting with friends to go back to Jeddah or going snorkeling somewhere or just hang out and watching a movie. If this is what small town living is like, perhaps I’ve been too hard on it the past. I have always said that I’m a big city girl, and I still honestly believe that I am. But there is certainly something to be said about the simplicity of community life. All of your friends live within walking distance, and chances are that if were all brave enough to join this community that you must have something else in common.

There are, of course, lot s of things that I miss about living in the city (any city). I miss the ability to just pick up and go to any restaurant I want (regardless of cuisine) without having to organize transportation. I miss public transportation. I even miss the noise to some extent. But I like the idea that I live in an area where everyone is nice to each other, everyone feels safe and everyone feels connected to everyone else. Sure, sometimes it can feel like I live in Stepford, with the cookie cutter houses and apartments, but even Stepford has its place I guess.

Overall I’d say this has been a positive experience so far. I was assigned to nice bi-level one bedroom apartment with an incredible view. I get to live in a country that most people can’t even come visit, and I’ve learned a lot about the Arabic culture and about myself in the process.

Imposition of Culture?

I want to address some of what I what I touched on when talking about how I view women's role here in the Kingdom.  I do, however, understand that to them it is completely normal and most of them are perfectly happy with the arrangement. I understand that my definition of freedom is very different to them and that my culture is completely different to theirs. My observations, were merely that, my observation from my very skewed and biased point of view. I have struggled with the idea that someone could be happy at being (what in my view is) limited in their freedom.

I will re-emphasize that the women here in Saudi seem happy with their role in society. This is even true of Saudi women that I know who have studied in Westernized countries (like US or UK) and have returned home to KSA and still fulfill their role as Saudi women fully and contently.  I know that there is something to be said about how people can only see things from their point of view, and I understand that mine is quite different to that of the women here. They don't seem to mind that they can't drive, can't vote, can't walk alone in the streets, can't catch a cab by themselves, can't travel without a male companion, can't wear what they want, can't have their picture taken, and (traditionally) can't study, work or really been seen in public with members of the opposite sex that are not immediate family. They have grown up this way and so to them it's normal.  In fact I almost feel that to them, my independence seems odd and even slightly off-putting. Why would I choose to be alone is something they all seem to question. It seems like everyday I get someone who looks at me a with a quizzical slant to their head when I tell them I'm here alone, and no I'm not married or living with my parents.

The role of women here is clearly defined and perhaps that is a good thing. These are women who don't feel the need to go out and prove themselves in the "real world." They are happy knowing that they are taken care of and that they are in control of their dominion (the household). I just wanted to say that is not how I want to live my life. Unlike the women in KSA, I was brought up to think that independence was something to aspire to. That you should go out and work and be on equal footing as anyone else (male or female). I like the idea that I can express myself in anyway I choose (be it clothing, expressions or even who I choose to spend time with). I want to drive and be able to go out in the city by myself and get lost and explore, but I can't. So perhaps my struggle is not me trying to impose my values and culture on Saudi but how Saudi is imposing itself on me.